Surviving

Chapter 26: The Boy Who Would Always Be Second

It was a quiet flight overall for Naerys and Aemond. Sure enough, Maelor did in fact fall asleep once they were settled in the skies. The child's face was nuzzled against Naerys' shoulder as he quietly snored and his little hands balled over the fabric of her gown.

Naerys was too distracted on keeping the boy safe in her arms as they took off. She'd grown used to flying on Syrax or Caraxes, but Vhagar was a different kind of flight. Vhagar was certainly slower, but the force Naerys felt at takeoff left her breathless. Her body was shot back against Aemond's initially, but even as they'd settled high above, she never moved away from him.

Tears continued to freely fall from her eyes as she looked ahead, every once in a while looking down to check on Maelor. She could feel Aemond's eye on her almost the entire time, but he remained silent. He didn't want to push her even in the slightest. He kept his arm wrapped around her while the other held onto the reins and rested against her thigh.

Something was picking at her in the back of her mind. Something Aegon had mentioned to her. He'd said something about leaving her alone if Aemond gave her up. She'd wondered what exactly Aegon meant by that. Though mostly, she wondered why Aemond would refuse something like that.

In all fairness, she wondered why Aemond did any of what he did. He was so cruel and heartless towards her in the beginning, yet now she felt like he was the only person she could trust. The only person she didn't have to hide from.

The only person she didn't mind getting under her skin.

She knew what was happening to her. She knew what was happening to her heart. It terrified her to think about, but she knew it the moment she saw Aegon in their chambers. She knew her heart was beating for someone else now.

As she glanced down at Maelor once more, she felt that same fluttering in her heart. A silver babe. Much like one her and Aemond could have together. She found herself wondering would their child favor his Valyrian features. Or her plain Strong features.

Her cheek rubbed against the top of Maelor's head before she placed a gentle kiss on his forehead. She'd be lying if she said it didn't make her miss Aerys, but it also made her realize she missed being a mother.

She missed that unconditional bond she had with her son. She missed tucking him in every night and waking every morning to him being brought into her and Qyle's chambers as he squealed for his mother to finally hold him.

For months she cried herself to sleep every night, praying for her husband and children to return. All she knew was loneliness in all that time, even Aliandra and Coryanne couldn't get her back to normal.

She swore she'd never remarry, yet she was returning to Dorne with a new husband. She swore she'd never have another child and would let the throne pass onto one of her brothers, most likely Luke or Joffrey. Yet here she was picturing a future with Aemond Targaryen.

The same man whose eye she took.

It was stupid of her to even think of a future like that with him. He never really mentioned that night, but on the rare occasion he would, she could see just how badly she'd hurt him as a child. How could he ever forgive her for that?

After all, she'd never forgiven herself for taking it in the first place. So why would he?

Aemond's hand gently brushed along her arm as he leaned down to whisper. "I can take him, if you wish to rest, Naer."

She just shook her head, not even looking up at him, but at the little boy snuggled up against her shoulder. If it was foolish to even think of, she'd be a fool for just a little longer. She could pretend for an easier life, even if only for another hour.