Journey to the new me

Chapter 20-----------It's okay not to be okay

The days passed by in a blur, and the grief over my best friend's death felt like a weight on my shoulders. Angel had died from leukemia, and I had no idea she was even sick. The last time we spoke, we had argued over something so trivial that now seemed meaningless. The guilt and regret of our last encounter weighed heavily on my heart, and I struggled to find a way to move on.

The diary her mum gave me sat on my nightstand, a silent reminder of my loss. I was afraid to open it, afraid of what I might find inside. Would it be a final message from Angel, or just a collection of mundane thoughts and musings? I couldn't bear to find out. Instead, I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling, the weight of my grief crushing me. I felt so alone, like a piece of me had been ripped away.

In the midst of my grief, I had forgotten about the scandal I was facing when I returned to school. It felt like a distant concern, compared to the pain of losing my best friend. The thought of returning to school and facing my classmates and teachers was overwhelming.

My family has been very supportive of me in this difficult time, and they've done everything they can to cheer me up. My dad has even been visiting me regularly, just to make sure I'm okay. I understand that my grief can be triggered by little things, and I appreciate everyone's efforts to help me through this.

My train of thought was cut off by a sharp knock on the door. Before I could answer, the door swung open and Efua's head popped in. She tiptoed into the room, as if one false step might trigger a landmine. Her caution was understandable - she knew she was on thin ice.

'You doing okay?' Efua's question was intended to sound casual, but it came off sounding rehearsed. I didn't have the energy to pretend I was all right. "I'm fine," I said flatly.

'You want to watch a K-drama with me?' Efua asked, tentatively, like she was afraid to give me any more reasons to reject her. I figured I could use a little bit of distraction from my woes. 'Yeah, I could do with that,' I replied, hoping she wouldn't press the issue further. 'Cool!' She said, trying to mask her elation. 'Let me just get changed, and then we can start.'

By the time I was done with my shower, she had already transformed my room into a makeshift cinema. She had propped mum's laptop up on my bed, turned down the lights, and pulled up a couple of blankets and pillows. 'You came with popcorn?' I asked her. She smiled sheepishly. 'Yeah, I figured you wouldn't mind,' she said, her smile growing wider. 'I mean, you're gonna want snacks to go with the show, right?'

I couldn't help but grin. 'I think I'm going to like this setup,' I said. She giggled and handed me a pack of popcorn. 'Now, let's see what K-drama we should watch,' she said, scrolling through Netflix. 'What are you in the mood for?' I shrugged. "I'm fine with anything, as long as it doesn't require too much brain power," I replied. Efua clicked on a few titles before settling on a rom-com. 'This one looks like it'll hit the spot,' she said, pressing play. And with that, we got cozy under the blankets and dug into the popcorn as the show began.

After a few minutes, I started to forget about my troubles, and I found myself getting drawn into the story. The plot was engaging, the characters were lovable, and the acting was top-notch. I found myself laughing out loud at the jokes gasping at the plot twists. And the best part was that Efua was right there with me, reacting to every moment of the movie. We ate popcorn, drank fanta, and gave our opinions on the characters and their decisions.

As the movie ended, we sat in silence for a few minutes, soaking in the aftermath of the finale. I turned to Efua. 'That was a great movie,' I said. 'It really was,' she agreed. 'I didn't think I'd get so invested in the characters, but I found myself really rooting for them.' 'Yeah, it's amazing how a good story can draw you in and make you care about fictional people,' I said. 'It's like you're living their lives with them.' Efua nodded. 'I guess that's the magic of storytelling.'

We sat there for a moment, and then I spoke up. 'Thanks for doing this,' I said. 'You really helped me take my mind off things.' Efua smiled. 'It was my pleasure,' she said. 'Bukky, how are you doing really?' Efua asked, her voice switching to that of concern. I sighed. "I'm hanging in there," I replied, my tone lacking its usual perkiness. 'But I'll be honest, it's been really hard lately.' Efua nodded sympathetically. 'You've been through so much lately. It's okay to not be okay,' she said. "I'm just worried about you. I don't want to see you suffer." I looked at her gratefully. 'I appreciate that. I really do. It's just that sometimes I feel like I'm drowning, and I don't know how to get out,' I said, my voice wavering. 'I know it feels that way right now,' Efua said, taking my hand in hers. 'But you have to remember that this is just a season of your life. It won't last forever.' I nodded, trying to take comfort in her words. 'And I'm here for you, no matter what,' she added. 'And I'm so grateful for that.' Efua smiled.

"It's what sisters are for, right?" she said, trying to lighten the mood. I laughed, despite myself.

We sat there in comfortable silence, just enjoying each other's company. It felt good to know I had someone who understood me and was there for me. But wait..when did my little sister get this matured..how come she speaks maturely...I smell something fishy.