Chapter 8

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3 weeks later.

I woke up, early in the morning. I heard Ethan on the phone to someone. Saying he'd go down to meet them soon. I came out of my room, in a short crop top, and shorts. How Ethan had always seen me, I wasn't really bothered how he saw me.

"Hey, morning who are you going to meet?" I asked him, stretching my arms out for a hug. He leant in and hugged me back.

"Morning, later the lads want me to come round for Sidemen Sunday, that's all" he said sighing. "Yeah, and what's up with that?" I asked him walking down to the kitchen with him.

"Nothing really, but I just can't be arsed, like I'm going to go and do it, but everyone just like distanced for a while, and we only ever get together for the content making. It's sad to be honest." He told me, truthfully.

"Well maybe, you should text the group chat, and make a meet up point, and see who can meet up? I mean, you guys haven't hang out for weeks now; maybe that's what you need." I told him, plotting toast into the toaster.

"Maybe your right, you know. Sometimes I love your ideas!" He told me, wrapping his arms around me and kissing my forehead. He rang the group chat, and everyone pretty much picked up. He never rang the group chat with me in the room, because if they didn't know I was here they would have basically no filter. Like they always do. I haven't seen them since forever, not since Harry has been acting off with me.

Ethan spoke to them, and they all said they could hang out. Ethan asked me if I wanted to come, but I told him it would be best if they just went together to spend time. In other words, I didn't want to come because I didn't want to bother with Harry. I knew at some point I'd have to deal with him.

Ethan then went out to film Sidemen Sunday. I was alone pretty much all day. So I decided I should invite company over. Not boys, I just needed girl company. But I didn't really know any girls.

I was in deep thought, then I thought, Freya! Josh's girlfriend! I had always gotten advice from her, and told her at some point we needed to hang out, so right now would be the best time to hang out with her!

I called her up, and explained to her where Ethan was, she told me she'd be down in 15 with snacks, because I told her I needed to talk to her about Harry. She was straight away down. This girl was like my number one supporter!

Within a few minutes, a knock seeped through the door, and it clashed open. "I'm here!" I hear Freya yell. "Hey! Come on into the living room! I'm just chilling!" I said to her, waiting for her to come in.

"I'm here to give my girl some company!" She said giving me a tight grasped hug. "Great! I needed it so bad, I've not had girl company for so long and just dealing with the lads was enough." I said, and she just laughed. She took a seat next to me.

"Tell me everything you need to tell me." She said, placing a hand on my leg.

"Well, there's a lot really.." I told her, looking down.

She shifted my head back up. "I want to know, every single bit!" She said.

"Alright. If you insist." I told her, taking a breath as I started rambling on.

"So basically, I first met the Sidemen guys, I had a good impression of them, and I love them! They are so sweet, and they make Ethan happy. But I seemed to get really close with Harry, within a few days like, literally 3 days. And then we had a night where I came over to watch a movie, ended up waking up at around 6pm, in between his legs. He then posted a story on Instagram saying "Your hair is nice", with a photo of my hair. I wasn't tagged, so it didn't matter but still, people was going crazy about it. Then he asked me to FaceTime that night, and we did. We was on FaceTime for about 4 hours, no joke. But at the end it was about 11pm, and I told him we was just friends since we had just met, and he seemed off about it. As I said that, he told me he was getting tired and said he was going to sleep, so I let him. And I felt quite bad for saying what I said, but it was true. I had feels, but I couldn't figure out what feels, and I had just met the guy! And then I was going to see him the next day, because Ethan invited me to come over to see the guys, so I came, and he didn't turn up. Then everyone started distancing from the Sidemen, and I felt like it was all my fault, I know i'm 17 but, I'm really struggling to cope. And I don't have a coping mechanism either." I told her, whilst she was nodding her head, every few seconds I made a public comment, or statement. She then breathed, and finally said something.

"Well, I understand where your coming from, and in all fairness you just met Harry, and that's not a problem, taking things slow is your decision, whether Harry likes it or not, and if he doesn't he will have to wait." She told me.

"And also, with the coping mechanism, I'm your coping mechanism, I'm always here for you, even though we also just met not long ago." She smiled saying.

"I know, but I just don't know if I should messaged Harry. He's taking this the wrong way! I never said I didn't want anything with him, but I knew the guy just a few days. I couldn't put myself through commitment whether it may not work or will!" I told her, throwing my hands up defensively.

"I get what you mean, like Harry is a nice guy, but maybe he just doesn't want to say something he'll regret to you, you know what I mean?" She told me.

We spoke for hours, until Ethan brought the most of the boys back, who saw me and Freya here.



A/N
I JUST WANT TO SAY, THERE WILL BE SMUT, MATURE READERS ONLY, AND SH, MENTAL HEALTH, AND SUICIDE. SO IF YOUR NOT PREPARED PLEASE DO NOT READ. IT'S BASICALLY READING THIS HOW SOME PEOPLE RELATE, AND I GET IT BUT YOU GUYS AREN'T ALONE, ILY!

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