She fell first but he fell harder

Chapter 19

TW: Self-Harm.

Harry's POV:

It's been weeks since the break up between Y/n and I. I don't know how to feel about it. I haven't touched a single spliff since. Y/n's right, It's bad for me. I need help seriously. Seeing her has been so hard, we haven't spoke since. I don't know how to talk to her about it. She's never going to forgive me, what if we never get back together. Fuck. I'd been laid in my bed most of the days, struggling to sleep without her beside me. I've hardly ate too.

I decide I should probably go downstairs and eat. I walk downstairs, grab a hoodie, and put on my usual joggers.

I grabbed a slice of bread, buttered it and put some ham on it. I didn't really want to eat it, but figured I should. Y/n, Ethan, Faith, JJ and Vik was down tonight. They was all in their own little conversation.

I took a bite of the sandwich, and couldn't bare to eat anymore. I threw it straight in the bin.

"Yo lad, come here" Ethan said. He signalled me to come over, and patted the seat next to him. I did, and sat next to him.

"You're looking really pale. You okay?" He asked me. My eyes drifted over to Y/n, instantly.

"I'm fine, just hardly slept." I said, now wishing I hadn't said it.

"I'm sorry lad, I heard about you and Y/n" He said, now looking at me, patting my head.

Y/n doesn't even look, she just keeps her eyes down to her phone. She looks upset.

"We're always here for you lad, you know that right?" Tobi said. "Just stay of the weed, It's not good for you."

I give Tobi a soft smile, he's right too.

"I'm going back off upstairs." I say, thanking them with a small smile.

"Okay lad, just come down when you feel better. Don't stay in there for too long lad." Ethan said.

I walked off upstairs, everyone knew. Y/n told them, why?

Y/n's POV:

I felt really bad about Harry. He'd obviously not been eating, nor sleeping. Ethan had been giving me princess treatment since the break-up. I hated it, but he was doing the same for Harry. I felt so bad for breaking up with him. But I can't deal with it, if he's going to be jealous when JJ was helping me then, that's not fair.

I walked off upstairs, and fell onto my bed. I tried to fight the urge to cut myself, but it was getting to hard.

I walked into my bathroom, and opened the door where my blades was.

I cut myself twice.

That was enough. It stung, but the pain made me feel reluctant.

I walked back to my bed, just before cleaning my arm.

I scrolled through Instagram, mainly to get it off my arm, but the stinging got worse. Instead I decided to look at my DM's. There was some really nice ones, and some begging me to start streaming. I took the thought in, and I would maybe start doing it.

With a long sleeved hoodie, I covered my arm and walked downstairs. I bumped into Harry on the way.

"Sorry" I muttered. He just looked at me, and we both walked into the living room where everyone was now.

"Hey" Ethan said, standing up and giving both of us a hug. I witnessed Harry getting skinnier and skinnier these days.

"We're planning on throwing a party tonight, for the pregnancy. Faith will be on mocktails, and you can have a few if you want tonight Y/n." Ethan said, smiling.