"I Feel..Loved" //An Angel Dust x (FEM) Y/N fanfiction\\

||Not your fault||Chapter 8||

Angel's POV

We were walking home from the creek, it was pretty dark, and I had Y/N right next to me. I watched her like a hawk to make sure she was safe.

We reached the house and she walked in without a word, I assumed she was tired. I walked in with her and saw her dart up to her room.

"N/N, are you okay?" I said as she was at the top of the stairs

"I'm fine, Angel. I'm just tired okay." she said, almost annoyed

I was a bit taken aback but decided not to bother her and sleep in the basement for the night, maybe she needed some alone time. 

I carefully opened the door and walked down and onto the couch

I laid there for a while, wondering if I had done anything wrong. I didn't think I did, but she had been like this ever since we left the creek.. I tried to think of anything that could've happened, but nothing came to me.. so I decided just to sleep and see if she's okay in the morning

Y/N's POV

I sat by my bed in room, beginning to cry

"Damnit! Why these thoughts.. why now?"

I realized how rude I had been to Angel earlier..

"Shit" I mumbled under my breath, he was probably sleeping in the basement by now

"Shit shit shit. Did he think i was mad at him? Damnit.. why do I fuck everything up" I said, sliding my back down the wall now, my face in my hands. I cried quietly enough that no one could hear me

"He probably thinks I'm mad at him.. ugh.. I can't talk to him right now though because I'm tired and I'll probably lash out again" I said through tears, picking up my phone to turn on music in order to calm me down.. to calm the thoughts down

"It wasn't his fault, it wasn't.. it was me and my stupid ass mind having these thoughts. Why can't I just be fucking happy for one whole day without these stupid thoughts" I whisper- screamed to myself

I walked to the mirror and looked at myself.. I took a deep breath and said "Calm down, Y/N.. calm the fuck down" It only worked a little bit.. I felt like I needed to destroy the world

knock knock

"Come in." I said in a voice that was more angry than I wanted it to be

Angel opened the door

"What do you want" I said, sitting down on the bed, arms crossed

"What the fuck are you doing Y/N?"  my thoughts screamed at me

"If you aren't mad at him, fucking act like it you absolute dumbass!" The thoughts screamed

"Hey.. you doin okay Y/N?" Angel said softly

Why am I mad.. I'm not mad at him but I'm mad... "No. And It's none of your business." I said, turning away from him

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT Y/N. YOU AREN'T MAD AT HIM WHY DID YOU SAY THAT" the thoughts said again. Tears started to run down my face again

"Did I do something wrong..? You can always talk to m-"

"Go. Away." I said, angrier and through tears "THATS THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF WHAT YOU WANT HIM TO DO Y/N. WHAT ARE YOU DOING" the thoughts scolded me again

"I-" He was about to protest but "Fine." He said, getting up, walking out and closing the door behind him

"..no-" I said, barely audible through my tears.. he was already out of the room and surely down the stairs

"Great job Y/N. You blew it, you had the chance to tell him you weren't mad at him and now it's all thrown away. Great for you" the thoughts said

"shut. Up." I said quietly, still crying a ton

"Fine" then it went silent

The silence was less comforting than the screaming..

I hit my fists on my bed in an attempt to let out anger.. but I was too tired

I just slept.. there on the floor, tear stains on my face

what a great fucking night.

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Wow... it was hard to write this man, i hate writing sad shit.

But, what will happen next😱

Anyway, I'm tired, love yall

Signed,

Kinsley!