natasha romanoff one-shots (gxg)

𝐬𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐥𝐲 (𝟐/𝟑)

At night, you cuddle. You're in her arms, as always, and she's resting her chin on top of your head. Natasha can't sleep, but she doesn't mind. Listening to you breathe and feeling you in her arms is a nice way to kill time, she's realized, and she doesn't mind doing it.

The woman's never been soft for anyone in her life before. Okay, sure, Clint is her best friend and she'd kill for him. She also feels slightly protective of Wanda. But she has never, never ever, laid still for hours just so she wouldn't wake someone who's sleeping in her arms. She's never gotten up early just to make tea in case another person gets stomach cramps. She's never felt the need to be with someone all the time, just to make sure they're safe, as she does with you.

The short version is: she's falling. And she's falling hard.

Natasha still doesn't know that, but she's starting to have an idea. She knows that things are changing, and that you're changing, and that she's changing too. She's not just your friend anymore — she's something more, something neither of you can define or put a label on yet. And maybe you don't need to do that anyways, as everything seems perfectly fine the way it is right now.

But at the same time, she's afraid. Natasha doesn't want to hurt you, and she's afraid of doing exactly that. Her being almost ten years older is just one thing she worries about aside from her being an assassin and, oftentimes, emotionally unavailable. She cares about you too much to let herself hurt you, which is why she's trying to stay away from you — something that obviously isn't working out. You still cuddle every night, you spend every second together, you sit in the trailer for hours doing nothing but talking. You can't define that as 'staying away', can you?

The redhead lays there, holding you. She's listening to every breath that you take, every silent mumble that leaves your mouth. She's stroking your hair gently enough so you won't wake up from it. She glances at you occasionally, making sure you're comfortable and asleep.

It's way past 2am right now, and you've been asleep for a few hours already. Natasha, on the other hand, is still awake. She can't sleep, after days of sleeping through the night comfortably, thanks to you. She knows she was only able to sleep because she held you in her arms, because she felt safe and she knew you were safe. Both very important things.

The woman glances at you again, her green eyes tired. She looks at your face, admiring your lips and your neat eyebrows. She resists the sudden urge to kiss your face, averting her eyes again to make sure she keeps herself in check.

. . .

You wake up together, your bodies entangled in a way they've never been before. You yawn silently, your face pressed against her neck as you're basically laying on top of her. Natasha's arms are wrapped tightly around your waist, holding you in place.

"This is a new one", she mumbles, referring to your sleeping position. "Did you migrate overnight?"

"I guess." You sit up, brushing the hair out of your face. "It was comfortable, though."

"Agreed." Her cheeks are the shade of a light pink. "Coffee or tea? You can get changed in the meanwhile."

"I'm the one making coffee today", you interject. "You change first."

She nods. "Okay, sure."

You smile and leave the bedroom. In the kitchen, you make the coffee and pour some into two cups. You add milk and sugar to one, and just sugar to the other.

Natasha arrives in the kitchen looking much fresher, her hair not messy anymore and her pajama exchanged for normal clothes. "It smells good." She takes her coffee, leaning against the kitchen counter.