017. Once Again

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The rainbow is gone
and rain starts to pour again,
but I have to live.

🌙

I AM LYING in bed with only a single thought in my head as I whisper, ❝How am I supposed to win this battle without losing in the end?❞

The room became radio silent while I was staring out the window. I closed my eyes and heaved a small sigh upon seeing the rain starting to fall once again. The sky is getting darker while the burden in my heart is getting heavier.

❝What am I going to do now?❞ I ask myself in the middle of the night while patiently waiting for someone to save me from darkness.

These dark thoughts lingering in my head are uncontrollable, and I am afraid that I can no longer run away. However, all these things keep me awake, and it is so unbearable, to be honest.

I am afraid that I can no longer fight this battle. However, I have to live in order to see what is waiting for me at the end of this line.

As the rain continued to fall, my tears began to shed. The thing is, I don't even know what I am crying for. Is it because I am about to give up? Is it because the pain is too much? I look away from the outside world, turn to the other side of the bed, put my headset on, and play some random music to shut the voices in my head for the nth time.

Maybe this is just one of the bumpy roads in life. I still want to live, so I have no choice but to fight.

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