18. Jealously at its Peak

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I tried to ignore the jealousy that tugged in my gut as I saw Blair's name flash over the screen

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I tried to ignore the jealousy that tugged in my gut as I saw Blair's name flash over the screen. Blair—a name that seemed to carry more weight than it should, one that evoked thoughts of inadequacy and insecurity in me.

"You haven't made me fall for you one bit?" Eleanor's voice broke through my thoughts, pulling me back to the present moment.

I blinked, taken off guard by the question. "Please, I'm like gravity—irresistible and impossible to escape," I said, infusing sarcasm into my tone to disguise the agony raging inside me.

Eleanor laughed, and the sound was like a tune, easing the strain in my chest. "Is that so?" she taunted, reaching out to lightly brush my ear.

Beneath the lighthearted conversation and enticing grins, though, a tempest of jealousy raged inside of me, threatening to overwhelm me. I wanted to confront the doubts that had been eating away at me and question Eleanor about Blair. However, I was aware that I couldn't take the chance of pushing her away due to my own concerns or causing a rift between us due to my jealousy.

I need to be honest with myself and figure out what I truly want before moving forward with my relationship. It's important to address these feelings and make a decision that is fair to both Athena and myself.

With my tactics, I could possibly make her fall in love with me in a short time. But I don't want to rush anything and regret it later. Better be safe than sorry. For some reason, I took her hands and brought her body up so she could stand. I gently stood behind her, carried her hair to the right side of her shoulder, and gently hugged my hands around her waist with my face buried in her neck.

I could feel her heartbeat against my chest, and in that moment, I knew I never wanted to let her go. Our connection felt deeper than words could express.

I could feel her heart beating faster as she leaned back into my embrace, but I knew it was important to respect her boundaries and not move too quickly. Taking things slow would allow us to build a strong foundation for a potential relationship.

But do we have a relationship? What do you call this?

"I just don't know what to feel about this," she said softly.

I remained silent, not knowing how to respond to her.

Her emotions seemed to be a tangled mess, and I could sense her inner turmoil. Perhaps giving her some space to process her thoughts would be best. 

I paused, choosing my words carefully, "I understand, Eleanor. It's normal to feel unsure sometimes. We don't have to rush into anything. Let's just take things one step at a time and see where it leads us." giving her the opportunity to gather her feelings and come to a decision on her own time.

In this way, she won't feel rushed or overwhelmed by the circumstance, allowing her to make more comfortable and confident decisions. It is critical for both of us to speak openly and honestly during this time.

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