Messy by Choice

Mess 12 (Ally)

This week has been hard, and sometimes I'm a weak woman. I have finals finished but did not feel confident with my portfolio. My professor said I would have to step it up if I still wanted her to put in a good word for the French internship. More emotion behind the strokes. I had the great restraint of not making a sex joke out of that.

But now I'm thinking about sex. Once I start having it with a guy my hormones unbalance and crave it pretty badly every night. My poor vib was about to give out. Lenox has texted me once every 36 hours wondering if we could see each other again. I've been ignoring him. Because after the throw up things felt too real. But now the world felt too much, and I really needed to let up some steam. It's Friday night and I tell myself I won't text him first, but if he does then... And like he's channeling my thoughts his name pops up.

It's that stupid meme, I showed you my dick please respond.

I laugh because it's so stupid. And he must be so desperate. I'm kinda desperate too right now.

If I let you come over, don't get too excited.

About a thousand excited emojis.

I'm coming now.

You coming now kinda defeats the purpose of what I want from you tonight.

Can you not text me shit like that? I almost crashed my car. Thanks.

I reply back with a candid picture of my tits.

LIHDFIHDUF

I wonder if that's all he's managed to text while getting in an accident. But he has a self-driving car for fuck sakes? Why doesn't he use it?

Oh. I get another text from him so he's fine.

My dick's hard enough to drive this car.

Dare you to send me the proof.

Immediate response. And it's right next to the steering wheel. That makes me laugh. Spending too much time fixating on the veins and dot of wetness at the tip makes me horny and I'm chewing on my bottom lip as I make it downstairs to my roommates all gathered in the living room.

"Sister," Sharon says with her theatrical self-made accent booming. She's drinking wine from her cauldron cups and wearing her sparkly pink robes trimmed with black feathers. "You've come forth in such high delight from your cave, why ever for?"

"Sister Sharon," I say, matching her theatrics with my own unique flared inflection. I'm really the only one of the roomies who keep up and feed into her acts, but Aur smiles at us and Vee underneath her cold facade I know secretly loves it too. "I am but in need of the release of capitalist endeavors and have ferried to find myself a gentleman of able body to countermand and rectify my misgivings."

There's a collective gasp.

"By and by!" Aur says, joining in on the act with a southern bell dialect, it's not great but her effort is there. She'll be a much better chemist than an actress. "You could never mean that gentleman of fraternal and Tesla descent? Our beloved Ally has been tainted!"

"AllyBeth! Thrice have you now consorted with thy boy! This could damn us all!" Sharon yells. "We must confer with the spirits of women past, present and to be!" My eyes roll. Sharon's always stretching to find any reason to make use of her cauldron. She throws what I think is ground up pink chalk, a lit teardrop ball of incense, and drips some of her wine in it for good measure while humming what I think is a Taylor Swift song. Her hands do some sweeping gesticulations over the rim as I give to her my patient attention and suspended skepticism.

"The sisters are speaking to me with nothing," Sharon says as we become eager listeners to her performance, except Vee who rolls her eyes lovingly at our antics but doesn't always like to actively participate with the high amount of effort it takes to keep up these dramatics. "They guide me to evaluate for myself his worthiness and perform the equivalent evaluation of a woman's palm reading. A reading of his manhood."