° chapter twenty three

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i was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere
fell behind on my classmates and i ended up here

i was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a spherefell behind on my classmates and i ended up here

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[09:30, a few hours earlier]

"Shall we start with your university application then?"
Teacher Nam had his hands clasped on the table, anticipating Dohee's answer who stayed silent. She hadn't really thought much of it except for the fact that she needed to get into one of the higher achieving Seoul universities. It was one of the few things she needed to do, for herself and for her parents. Other than that, nothing. The silence continued for a few minutes longer as Dohee decided between answering, the words she would use to answer and ignoring him altogether. Running out of the room and fleeing the country was also a fleeting thought that came up more than once.

"I don't know what you want me to say."

"We had a discussion before summer break and you had a few options in mind. What happened to them?"
She paused for a second, figuring it was going to be like this a lot during the meeting. A lot of silence and a lot of avoiding. All she could hope for was that Teacher Nam was going to get tired of waiting around for Dohee and send her out once he got bored.

"I might have to rethink them. They don't seem very realistic anymore."
Her hands slid off the table where they rested onto her lap, her nail subconciously beginning to drag across the pad of her index finger under the table.

"Why not?"
His eyes moved on to the computer screen as he spoke, browsing the notes he had taken from the last time he spoke to Dohee whilst waiting for her answer. Teacher Nam thought to himself a little, according to his notes, it was true that Dohee was aiming for really high achieving universities. Not the highest of the lot but she was aiming to study at either one of the colleges of a well-respected league, at least top ten in the country. It was hard to guide a student like Dohee, being accepted into colleges like that was possible, given she put the effort and the hours required behind the scene. She was more than capable of it, he knew that, he just wasn't quite sure she was doing the extra work. Dohee was never one to walk into a meeting this unprepared. If they had this meeting a year ago, she would have had her list prepared, no back ups needed because she was sure she was doing what was right. She would've been doing the talking. The way she articulated her words was what kept her known amongst the teachers. He was never one to lump a group of students together and give them a label but the simplest way to put it was that she was a student who got high grades, not always the highest but high nonetheless. She goes so far and misses by just the slightest bit, slipping under the radar each time. She wasn't really vocal, she didn't really have a voice, she just floats in and out of the classrooms and through the corridors and her presence went really easily unnoticed. It was something he had been trying to get her out of for five years. Introverts stay introverted is what he learnt. As a student she had promise but it was really all in her hands at this point. There was so much happening with Dohee recently, it was kind of hard to see where this was all going. Teacher Nam could confidently say someone this wishy-washy only comes by once in a few years and it was difficult to understand what they want to take and why.

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