The Silence

20

POV: HARRY

A week passed and the doctors said I can go home.

My mom doesn't want me to go to school yet, but I don't want to be alone anymore.

Should I be afraid? Maybe. Most people probably know what happened. I just have to get ready for those meaningless words "I'm so sorry", "I'm so glad you're back".

They can all kiss my ass.

I walk into school with my head held high as if the whole suicide attempt thing never happened. I'm actually very stressed, but others don't have to know about it.

If I'm more like Louis, they'll be afraid to approach me and I won't have to talk to them.

Just be like Louis. Just be like the handsome dickhead.

Cold, mean, mysterious.

I'm walking down the hall, I feel the eyes of curious students on me.

I want to hide. I want to disappear. I don't want to be in school anymore.

No.

Cold, mean, mysterious.

I'm looking for my friends.

Out of the corner of my eye I see people I know, but we are no longer friends.

They give me worried looks, but I ignore them. I just walk past them.

I'm looking for my new friends.

I see Niall's blonde hair. I silently approach them.

"Hi..." I speak in a hoarse voice.

Since Louis stopped visiting me in the hospital, even though he said he would keep coming, I haven't talked to anyone. Even to my mom so my voice is kinda unused at the moment.

"Jesus, Harry. You're here." Niall hugs me. "We're so glad to see you." He moves away to his arm's length, but his hands still rest on my shoulders. The blonde adds in a quieter voice. "How do you feel? Does it still hurt?"

"I'm fine... Yeah it's still kinda stings sometimes... But I'm better now. I'm sorry you had to see me like this..." I look down. I'm embarrassed.

"Oh Harry, don't be sorry. Nothing happened. Really." Zayn says with a slight smile on his face.

"Where's Louis?" I ask.

"He hasn't come to school lately. When we asked what he was talking about, he said something about cleansing the spirit." Liam laughs. "He's probably sitting stoned as fuck somewhere."

I chuckle. "A very possible scenario."

I try to pretend I'm not worried, but it's not true. I wonder what he did during those days when he was neither at the hospital nor at school.

"Hey, Harry... Can we talk?"

We all turn towards the tall brunette boy.

"Fuck off, McClair." Zayn says in an arrogant tone as he looks Jake up and down.

"I'm not talking to you, Malik." My ex-friend turns to me and has a sad look on his face. "Please, Harry. I just need a moment. That's all I want."

I sigh. "Fine."

Jake and I move more to the side of the hall to have some privacy. I feel my friends' eyes on my back as they lead me away.

"So? What is it?" I say with my arms crossed.

"I wanted to apologize to you. I was stupid, I know. I shouldn't have said all these things, and after your..." Jake puts his hands in his front pockets, lowers his head, and shifts his weight from one leg to the other. "You know..."