Lloyd, The Green Ninja Blog #1

Udder Destruction.

Manly. Me.

Sorry. Restart.

Manly. Alllllll me.

No. It still doesn't sound good.

Manly. Me. Allllll me.

There! The more me's there are, the better.

Okay fine. Here's the real manly thing. The thing I was supposed to say.

My voice is low and I start again.

"Manly. Toothpaste. "

Jay looked at me weird as he approached.

Whoops? Did I say that aloud?

Jay squirted at me and I ducked, letting the swirl of white make a spirally shape on the wall. In a matter of minutes, the complete bathroom was covered.

And then my "Green and Great" tube made a farting noise.

Shoot.

I was out.

Jay cornered me and put his tube right in my face. I gasped and pressed myself against the walls, clawing at the tile, my emerald green eyes scanning for a way out; an escape.

But there was none.

Oh no.

He had me.

"NOO!" I screamed, ducking as Jay squeezed his tube.

But his "Electrifying White" tube made a farting noise.

And it was out.

We looked at the tube, at each other, and at the tube again.

"Well," Jay awkwardly ran his hand over his shoulder, "we did kind of settle it."

"Ya. A little," I agreed.

We looked around both thinking one thing.

Now what?

"Lets break out!" Jay hissed, sneaking up to the door. I don't know why he was sneaking! It's not like anyone can see him. Except me.

But I followed his example and tiptoed up to the door, pressing my ear on it.

I heard Kai talking to someone. I think it was Zane.

Jay laughed evilly as we listened in.

"Hey Zane!" We heard Kai laugh. "What happened to the cow as he jumped over the fence?"

Zane paused before answering. "It would depend on the weight of the cow and the height of the fence, for normal cows do not jump over fences. That is why we put them up in the first place, to keep them in the field, knowing they won't escape."

Kai stuttered. "Ya, but when it did jump, what happened?"

Zane answered again. "Kai, I already told you that it would depend on t-"

Kai gave up and interrupted Zane. "Udder destruction!" He burst out, telling the answer. Then, he laughed really loud and fell on the floor.

We heard a thud. And we guessed he fell on the floor. Kai usually falls to the floor when he laughs a lot or if something's really funny.

"I don't get it!" Zane declared.

"It's a pun!" Kai laughed. "Two meanings? Udder destruction!?" Again he hooted.

I could just see Zane watching a laughing Kai roll on the floor. He must be baffled.

Jay looked at me puzzled as a noise rattled the door. The doorknob shook, vibrating on Jays face.

It made a huge red mark. Like a bear kissed him.

Or a speaker was thrown at his face.

I hope it was the first. But the second would be fine too. I would be the one to throw it though.

Anyway, the door shook and Kai stopped laughing. His voice became low and husky.

"What is it, Frosty?"

"The noises have stopped!" Zane explained. "I am going to see if they apologized."

Jay and I looked around the bathroom. Toothpastes outlined the sink, walls, toilet, floors, counters, bathtub, and even the roof! The mirror had speckles on it and the rug shooshed when you stepped on it.

We looked back in silence. It took a lot of effort for me not to laugh at Jays red blotch.

This was serious though.

I laughed inwardly at Jays cheek and how funny it looked when he was serious.

Anyway, back to the serious stuff.

Jay crunched his nose, most likely wondering why I was biting my lip to keep my laughter in.

Sorry.

Serious.

Ahem.

One thing was for sure.

They could not see this mess. We would be in trouble. Big trouble. And I don't want another spanking.

I looked around the toothpaste room.

It was an 'Udder Destruction.'

GREEN NINJA O-U-T.

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ALLIGATOR.