The Love Dodecahedron Duology (Book 1 + 2)

Exclusive Chapter 1 (200 view special)

Flashback – 3 years prior

Clarence was a degeneratay. After taking the entrance exam, and scoring –69 points, the school bored had decided that she was not worthy of being an Intelligente. That night, her Asian parents threw many slippers, as her brother, Jeremiah, played Blox Fruits in the corner. On the 3rd week of year 7, Clarence was already bored of this school life; the other degeneratays would scream the whole lesson, which would distract her from pirating anime in class. The school had even blocked YouTube. How utterly rhidikuluss.

One cloudy day with a chance of meatballs, as she walked home from Northe Mouldy College, she saw something shiny on the floor. 'Maybe it's money', she thought hopefully. She hunched down like a fried shrimp to see that it was actually just a chunky gemstone necklace that was probably stolen from Charlie's in the 1900s. How disappoint. She examined the gaudy kitschy flamboyant cheap lurid necklace. A large 100% grass-fed wild-caught organic free range cage free cage pasture botox plastic emerald charm that had the diameter of a large baseball hung down from the middle, adorned on all four sides by sparkly lead highlighter acid infused gems of various mismatched sizes and colours that most definitely did not scream "yas gworl yahoo!" Perhaps she could scam someone and sell it, and finally get enough money for a Crunchyroll subscription.

She stood up, still in shrimp posture, necklace in hand. A bright ray of sparkly glittery awesome sauce blinding slay queen light was emitted from the necklace, causing Clarence to squint her already squinty ching chong eyes. And from within the necklace came a tiny ugly spirit creature, that had taken a form alike an overfed albino penguin.

"hewwo my name is Peepee~"

Clarence's eyes widened to the size of a white persons in shock. She had never seen an uglier magical girl companion in her whole career of pirating anime.

"u have been choosed for an almighty mew task by the holy spirit," Peepee continued, "She has sent astral projections of herself to grant powers to 4 chosen ones."

"So, you're saying I've been chosen to save the world?" Clarence asked, excited.

"yes ofc, u and 3 others from ur schol."

Clarence paused. Would she really be committed enough to save the world between her extremely important mathecking classes and anime binge sessions? And what if it was extremely dangerous, like in Madoka Magica?

"What powers will I be getting?" she inquired apprehensively, like a dog shaped bomb in a freezer.

"You and the others will have any powers I deem necessary for you to bring two people together. Together, you four will be Cupid, bringing love in the name of hinged."

Matchmaking? That's all she had to do to prevent the destruction of the universe? That would be absolutely totally easy peasy lemon squeezy! After all, she had watched Fruits Basket and read dominating alpha x submissive omega Y/N x trafalgar law fanfiction enough times to know exactly what romance was like. (grr! 😾😻)

"Ohk", she reluctantly agreed.

"Very well." Peepee climbed onto her hand, and a toenail gunk crack appeared.

"Wow I don't feel any different this is so modern"

"Hey jessay! Awooooowooowo feels like a party everyday hey jessay awoowowoowowowo-"

"Jeez Peepee I get it, I'll use my powers soon. See you 💃"

Sprinting away with renewed caffeine in her brain, she went to join her friends and degeneratays, Laurel-yanny and Tikki.

Laurel-yanny trotted alike a stallion along the path to the cemetery. A solemn bowl of Choles branded rice lay in her palm. It had been a long time since she'd listed all 2 of her luke-warm achievements to her Asian Ancestors, along with a timeline of the last year of her life with data points per minute. Kneeling down and adjusting her 17 cm thick glasses frames, she stuck a pen through her hair to complete her "satisfactory easily-replaceable competent Asian child" OOTD. "It is I, Laurel-yanny."