all too well // august horn av årnäs x reader

22

wille didn't go school for a couple days. the day he came back, we all had a mandatory ceremony to pay our condolences and offer our support to him, here at hillerska.

everyone had to line up at the entrance and he would greet people accordingly.

i stood next between august and felice in the line. wille hugged the headmaster and some of his teachers then made his way over to us. he hugged felice and pulled away; moving his sight to me.

his face looked devastated.

i pulled him in for a tight embrace, rubbing his back in a comforting way and wishing i could just take away his pain.
our hug lasted a bit more than his hug with felice.

i felt a hand slide around my waist, motioning for me to let go of wilhelm.

i thought it was a weird thing to do but my first reaction was to go along with it; slowly pulling away from him.

"i'm always here." i whispered quickly.

he gave me a small sad smile and moved over to august, who when i looked down at my body, was the one to blame for the sudden pulling away from my hug with wille.

oh

is he jealous again?

i didn't see what was harmful about wilhelm and i. we were merely friends and i was just trying to comfort him.

he removed his arm from my body and put his two hands on wilhelm's shoulders, bringing their foreheads together.

why guys do things like that?

i feel like they're never affectionate with each other despite the fact that if they were, it'd be more beneficial than harmful.

a hug would've probably helped more to be honest.

the ceremony ended and then we went back to our regular class schedule.

i was still taking third year classes so i didn't get to see wilhelm too much. but i saw august often.
there was something off about him but i couldn't put my finger on it.

"y/n?" my math teacher called out.

i broke out of my thoughts.

"...yes?"

i hadn't been paying any attention to what was being taught.

"what is an imaginary number?"

since WHEN are numbers imaginary??

i looked at the board trying to see if maybe she had the answer somewhere. when i couldn't see anything useful, i began thinking back to any time it might've been mentioned.

imaginary. imaginary. imaginary. imaginary.

oh!

"they're numbers that when you square them give you a negative result. they're imaginary because they don't have a definite value."
i said, hoping i was right.

"very good." she nodded and went back to talking about boring mathematics topics.

i sighed, looking down at the blank notebook in front of me.

i don't know why but i had the habit of zoning out in math class, so a lot of things were left unanswered or empty in some way. i'm not even sure how i managed to get a good grade on the class.

my brain kind of picks up the info and then vomits it on the exam, and then it erases off my memory after some time passes. i can't remember anything i learned last year... or last month.

i finished my last class and put my backpack on my desk, packing up my stuff.
i was one of the last ones to leave the classroom, but i could see someone else hadn't left yet.

two arms wrapped around me from behind softly.

"hi." i heard august say, feeling the smile he had on his face.

"hi" i replied.

he placed a small kiss on my neck then rested his head on my shoulder despite our height difference.

"i wish i could stay with you."

"why don't you?"

"i have to go to the gym."

he spent a lot of time working out. maybe too much. i wasn't sure why he felt like he needed to exercise so often, he was already toned and had a great body.

"oh... right."
i said, slightly disappointed.

surely he could skip a session for me.

"i'll see if i pass by your dorm after, yes?"

i hummed in agreement.

he used his hands to turn me around; keeping his hands on the curve of my waist.

he lifted one of his hands up and put his fingers on my chin then bent down, kissing me on the lips.

we went in different directions and i began heading back to my dorm.
as i walked, i spotted wilhelm sitting by himself in front of the lake. his nose was red and he seemed exhausted.