31 ~ Don't Make Me Yours

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The room filled with applause, and suddenly I felt embarrassed, and my cheeks reddened to show my emotions. I felt a hand on my shoulder as I looked to see Adam holding me.

"Excuse us, Alpha Stephan." He said,
keeping his eyes locked with mine.

"Thank you for dinner," the Alpha replied, as Adam pushed me out of the room.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," I said, referring to my name, as he held my hand and pulled me behind him. "I didn't mean for it to happen like that... I didn't know what to say. I'm sorry Adam." He didn't reply, but kept walking. "Can you say something?"

He stopped in front of what I recognized to be his room. He opened the door and motioned for me to enter.

"Are you mad?" I asked, after he closed the door behind him.

"Octavia..." He whispered, taking two slow steps towards me. He closed the space between us when his lips came in contact with mine. He picked me up and placed me on his bed gently. He deepened the kiss, sending millions of tingles down my body. I could feel Nika howl and Lana purr in delight. I broke away and looked him straight in his darkened eyes.

"Why the sudden... Burst of emotions?" I asked.

"Your name made my wolf crazy with need," he murmured. "We couldn't resist." He added as he pushed me down on my back and connected our lips once again.

He made me feel like I was on fire. He made my body hot and wanting more. And I loved it.

"Adam..." I mumbled as he kissed my neck.

"Octavia..." He replied. "I want to make you mine." He said and he kissed the spot that werewolves would usually mark each other.

Something about that sentence made my heart skip a beat. I didn't want to be anyone's, I was my own person. I belonged solely to myself and my animals, and they belonged to me. I never wanted to have to depend on anything else. For the past few years I had been teaching myself how to care for myself, to make sure that I would never have to be dependent on anyone. And I wasn't ready to fully give that up.

"Don't..." I whispered. Suddenly he stopped.

"You don't want to belong to each other?" He asked, and I could see his face fill with confusion and pain.

"I don't know," I replied, sitting up beside my mate.

"Fuck..." He murmured.

"I don't want to become dependent on you, or on anyone. For years I've been alone, and now all of a sudden everyone's expecting so much of me. This whole pack is expecting me to become their Luna. Can you imagine me choosing paths for the well being of this pack, when I can't even chose what to eat for dinner without questioning myself?"

"You were made to be this pack's Luna," Adam replied. "And from the minute I saw you, I imagined what an amazing Luna you would be. Octavia, you are strong, determined and a natural leader. The pack already seems to love you."

"I just want to keep my options open." I replied. "I've barely been here two weeks, and now I'm just supposed to settle down. I look selfish, I know, but I've already agreed to help this pack and learn to heal, I don't want to take away my freedom too-"

"You will still be free. I won't lock you up again," Adam interrupted.

"Bullshit, Adam. I know what happens when two mated wolves are too far apart. They feel unbearable pain, sometimes even die. I want the option to leave without dying."

"You want to leave me?" He asked, his eyes filling with such hurt that all I wanted to do was wrap my arms around him.

"No, no of course not." I reassured. "But I want the option to. Don't look so hurt, Adam, please."

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