Him & I

48

After the incident with Pamela, things at school have been different. Somewhat.

She hasn't shown up at school since that Tuesday, and it's all everyone has been waiting for, I can see that. She's all they've been talking about, all day everyday. Well except Victoria. Of course.

At first I was scared she was going to bring it up during our project session at my house yesterday, adding a mean comment here and there keeping me in a dilemma of shutting it down in respect to our once-upon-a-time friendship, or actually join in, but...

Victoria really doesn't hate Pamela. She just could care less.

Rather the only thing we discussed other than school work, was Nathan.

My eyebrows went up when she tried oh so very hard to ask about his whereabouts whilst still acting like she wasn't exactly interested to find out.

"How's your friend, uh Nathan, is it? Don't think I've seen him at school lately."

I felt like teasing her about it, but then I thought better. Our friendship isn't like that. Coupled with the fact the reason Nathan and I aren't even close anymore is because one of us caught feelings. It'd be hypocritical to give her false hope.

"Yeah, I don't think I've seen him around either."

"But he's your friend." She pressed. Right.

She gave me a pen, clarifying she'd borrowed it from Nate more than a week ago, so I offered to return it. It's why she gave me anyway, I know that. It's to go visit him and find out if everything's okay 'cause I bet her heart's a lot worried.

So Tyler drops me off at Nathan's instead of home. He did get a bit... angsty when I told him to— which of course, caused butterflies— but I let him know it was for a friend. And I might have indicated there's something going on between then in order to calm his mind completely.

"Sorry, do you live here?" A petite lady with her hair in a tight ponytail asks. Ask me, I later realize.

"No, I don't. I came to visit someone." I tell her. She's a new worker here, the sparkly navy uniform plus the fact that she's questioning my presence lets me know. Every other worker would just allow me in. They all know who I come here for.

"Okay, Could I get your name please?"

I blink at her. As if that should change a thing.

Realizing it won't, I nod and walk over to the receptionist counter she's at, leaning on it as I watch her go through the computer for the name I still haven't given.

"Name?"

"Melissa. Melissa Martinez."

After an agonizing ten minutes of being treated like a guest, she lets me go up the elevator. As the door slides close, I feel like hitting them. I don't know why.

No, I do. This is the first time my visit has ever been questioned in the past three years after the first initial time before Nathan made sure to add my name as family on their guest list.

And this is the first time I've come over since he suggested we stopped being friends. I know it's a coincidence, the lady's just new plus when she checked, my name still showed up as family. But I swear that it feels so symbolic. And there's this tight feeling in my chest from it.

The elevator does a ding sound, but I have to wait for the doors to automatically open before leaving. It always takes a while.

Their hallway is still quiet, the flowers still inorganic, that sofa nobody seems to ever use is still there by the far end of the wall. Everything's the same. At least some things haven't changed.