Swim Away (Mermaid)

Chapter Thirty-Five

"There's a way."

I repeated it in my head way too many times to count.

But remembering the conversation I had with Asher, he had a point.

"There are also consequences. Do you really want to go through that?"

I was so sure of my response, at the time.

"If there's a way, I will do anything."

Spells weren't something to mess with, but why were they in my journal?

Asher said that Clara's journal didn't contain spells. His reaction to my journal having spells was off. He was a protector, wouldn't he have known something like that?

Every one of us didn't have the full details. It would be better to stay away from anything mermaid. But as much as I thought about it, I couldn't just go back to my old life. Too much has happened.

My only option was to go forward and that required me to unlock all these secrets. Asher was already steps ahead of me. His search for the third journal hadn't been a success, but his determination to find it didn't waver.

If only I had that same determination. But there were to many doubts holding me back. I had what I needed in front of me and so many things were pushing me back.

I hugged my legs and placed my chin on my knees. I kept my eyes on the horizon, wishing I could go for a swim.

Swimming as a human was something I longed for since I became a mermaid, but having my legs back only made me miss being able to swim further. Besides, since the day I lost my tail, the water felt different against my skin. It was a feeling I couldn't explain, even if I tried.

I closed my eyes, trying to enjoy the breeze. I smiled to myself, remembering the nights I would sleep out here. This place was so relaxing that I would fall asleep easily. I couldn't believe I actually missed when that happened.

Nice and simple.

I fell back with arms above my head. I didn't care about the sand getting everywhere. I needed this. I needed to relax. Somehow.

The relaxation that I wanted didn't last very long. My mind began racing again. I knew I could solve one of my problems and part of me couldn't let that go. Asher's warnings were what fought against these thoughts. This was an endless fight.

I turned over and met with someone's legs. I jumped up and backed away. I looked up to see who's legs they belonged to.

"I never see you anymore," Selena said. She gave me her hand and I took it, standing up. I tapped off some of the sand from my body. "This is a rare sight."

"Ha! ha!"

"Seriously. Are you okay? Maybe a swim with me should make up for the absence?" She tilted her head, smiling.

"I'm not in the mood." I wasn't ready to tell anyone else that I didn't have my tail. Well, actually, Selena was the only other person who knew I was a mermaid. "Another time."

I took a step away from Selena, heading back home, but I froze. I took another look at Selena and it felt like a brick hit my head. I had to place my hand where the imaginary brick hit me.

I could use her.

Damn, no. Asher would not approve, but he wasn't my protector so what was it to him.

She could help me get one step closer to what I wanted. I could actually do this. Then I would deal with everything else when I got to it. I just needed to have faith that this would work out.