Swim Away (Mermaid)

Chapter Thirty-Six

I took a look at the list one more time and tried to figure out how to gather everything I needed before it was too late. The journal informs that this spell would not work after a month has passed, and the end of the month was near.

I had two days to get what I needed.

Two.

I didn't think Selena would have her answer by now, but I would definitely ask tomorrow. Even without her, I would try to do the spell. The decision she had to make was a big one, so I understood if she didn't want to go through with it.

If Asher knew I had something missing, he would never let me go through with it. I could only hope this would work out for me.

I clenched my chest, feeling the flame still burning in my chest.

These choices were only going to make the burn worse. Spells were under the DO NOT part of the journal, but I believed they were put there for a reason.

I leaned against my table and shut my eyes. I took a deep breath and tried to calm the flame.

I turned and for an instant, I thought the journal was at the edge. I placed my hand over it and felt nothing there, but then I heard a voice. My eyes grew wide.

"It can be helpful, if you're willing to take the risk. Remember, you won't need those, not unless say, the world is ending."

"You're joking." I heard myself say.

"I know you'll have to use at least one of them, but I want you to know that there will always be another way to handle the situation. This," he tapped his finger on one of them, which happened to be called, Revive, "or," he pointed to another at random. That one was called melt. "this will never be the best solution. Some mermaids have used them in the past. Yes, it helped them. No, they didn't survive. Or, they got lost, and that is somewhere you don't want to be."

I shook my head and put my hand on my head. I could feel the tears building, ready to consume me. It felt as if I was losing consciousness. The book appeared again with Noah pointing to it. Knowing it was some illusion, I walked toward him and tried to put my hand against his chest, but it went through him, causing him to disappear.

"Stop. Stop!" I shouted, my eyes tearing up. I fell against the wall and my chest tightened. I tried to take in a breath and remind myself that I had the one thing that would bring him back.

I slid down to the floor. My eyes frozen on my hands.

Why did I see that?

I put my hand to my face and pushed my hair back. I slammed my head against the wall behind me. It felt like everything the storm caused happened yesterday, everything that affected me was rushing back. The loss reaching my heart and squeezing it till I couldn't breathe.

I needed to get away. I pulled myself off the floor, ran down the stairs, and went out the door. I could feel the sand brushing against my feet as I ran until I felt the cold water. I stopped and stared at the sea ahead.

"I don't know what I want anymore!" I sobbed to the open sea, and hugged myself.

I couldn't decide whether I really wanted my tail back or not. I didn't know if bringing Noah back was the right thing to do. Both could bring a horrible outcome, with my tail gone I had no idea what that meant. Would its return make my situation worse?

The waves continued to crash onto me and inside, deep inside, I missed swimming in the ocean.

I stayed out by the ocean for hours and waited for the right time.