6463 l.h

e i g h t e e n

"Liza, I-" he sighs but I cut him right away

"I just want to tell you this" I clear my throat and swallow the fear of saying what I gathered to say "I'm not gonna beg you to choose me" I watch my voice come out as an almost strong tone, I pierce my sad blue eyes in his bright ones "If you want me I'll be here wanting you like crazy but if you choose her I won't crawl begging you to change your mind. I won't do that because if I have to beg you to stay then you never loved me at all"

I look down and bite my lower lips

"I'll just ask you one thing" I take a deep breath "Please don't brake my heart" I plead feeling like crying but swallow it down right away "Its barely holding up together" I stand up and run my hand through my pale face "I have to go now, just take some time but don't forget" I make sure to stare him real strong "I won't crawl" my legs rush out of the auditorium giving him no time to say something back.

I really mean it. I'm madly in love with him but I will not make an idiot out of myself pleading him to choose me. If he doesn't it will be extremely hard to hold myself up but I'll have to make peace with it for the better.

I just hope he choses me.

Luke's POV

I heard her mouth saying those three words I thought she'd never say.

I watch her pale clean face paint a portrait of the real her.

I saw the real Liza for the first time in months.

I stared her eyes finding her demons hiding beneath her skin begging her to let them out.

I found what I was looking for on the moment she shut down her defenses.

I held her strong gaze as she poured her heart out for me, getting me the chance to see her like no one ever did.

I fell for her more than ever, if it's already possible.

I know why she left like that, its crystal clear what I have to do now. It just took me some time because I'm a slow lanky person but now I know what I gotta do.

I left the auditorium and headed to the library where Kira and Ashley are studying, I asked a moment alone with Ashley and Kira left us on the table.

"Whats up?" Ashley asks having no clue what's about to happen, maybe she doesn't know me at all because when I asked Kira to leave she glanced at me knowing something wrong was up

"There's this thing I need to talk to you about and I really can't wait" I rant, snapping my fingers due the nervousness behind my words

"Okay" she frowns her brows "Just tell me babe"

"I feel like I'm not being honest with you" I look down and take a deep breath "I, I-"

"Luke just tell me" she pleads, touching my hand over the table

I look into her eyes trying to say what I must say but there's something holding me back, I look into her eyes and lose my strength. I bite my lower lip and sigh, glancing at her with the words written all over my face. I hope she gets it.

I watch her face twitch and it looks like she's hurt. She takes her hand away from mine with a wounded look.

"Luke please, don't do it" her voice is weak and fragile. I see tears falling from her face. This is hard.

The thing is: I know clear as day that Liza is the one I love but I can't ignore the fact that I've been head over heels for Ashley since I saw her three years ago.

"I came back to you Luke" she wipes tears off her eyes "Please don't break my heart" she looks down

Both Liza and Ashley asked me to keep their hearts save. I promised Liza but I can't hold it for Ashley.

"But it's not fair, Ashley" I try to hold my tears "I can't lead you thinking I still feel the same when I don't"

"But I came back for you" she pleads "Please we have to find a way to make it work" she cries and I feel horrible for doing this

"Do you really want it? To keep going knowing I don't feel the same?" I tilt my head and she looks away

"I love you Luke and you love me" her voice is a whine "At least you used to, you found a way to love me back then so I think you could find your way back"

"Ashley, its different" I sigh

"Remember the night I left? That I creeped out of your room and drove to the airport, that night before we fell asleep you said you'd love me forever and if you ever felt different you made me promise I wouldn't let you go" she clenches her jaw and brings me back to that night, I remember it. "And I promised you that, I promised to keep you close because we'd always love each other even when doubts perhaps showed up"

"There's no doubt Ashely" my voice is calm

"Please we have to try fixing it" she begs holding my hand "You can't simply give up on us without even trying" she squeezes my hand and my heart stop beating "You used to love me to death, that can't just disappear"

She's right. I think we can try for a bit. I owe Ashley this, to at least try.

"Okay, but if things show up crystal clear you have to understand" I pierce her eyes

"I will" she smiles and leans to kiss me.

She just pecks my lips but it feels so wrong. Like they're meant for someone else.

I remember what Liza told me minutes ago

if I have to beg you to stay then you never loved me at all

Liza's POV

I found Kira leaving the library with a frown on her face

"Hey, what's wrong?" I ask her

"Luke is in there talking to Ashley" she glances back to the entrance then back to me "He said it was important"

A spark shines in me, he's probably breaking up with her. I shouldn't be so happy but I am.

We chat for a while and she tells me Calum asked her out and they're going to the beach today. After a bit I spot Luke leaving but he's not alone, Ashley is with her arm around his waist.

I had my car keys in hand and they fell onto the floor. My heart stops beating and I feel my insides being frozen.

He chose her.