You and Me (Larry Stylinson-Book One)

Chapter 18 - The Third Month

A/N Another one page update .. You all hate these I know but I'm doing them for a reason :)

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   I had thought that the pain would be better than this.

I thought that it was sure as hell be better than the numbness that had once controlled me.

But boy, I was wrong.

After I had felt pain for the first time again, it's like that's all I could ever feel. And as sick and odd as it sounds, I strangely enjoyed it.

It was wrong to feel that way, i know it. But I couldn't help it. I had absolutely no desire to have the horrible numb back.

This past month consisted of over sized sweaters that covered my wrist, having no plead to have the boys see what I had done to myself.

I got sick at the sight of them actually. My once soft, clean wrist were now covered in scars. Some fresh, some old. It didn't matter how old they were, just the look of them gave me the same pain as a new cut would give.

I hated myself for torturing myself like I have, but as much as I hated it, I couldn't stop. It was the only thing that would cure me.

For the first time in a while I had let myself smile, actually go out and hang out with the boys. I acted as if nothing was wrong, and they believed me.

I was utterly disgusted with myself.

But that didn't stop me from going home every night and leaving a new trail of slices on my fragile skin.

What would Harry say if he saw me like this? So weak, so broken, so destroyed..

He still hadn't woken. Still hadn't made a hint of his being alive. The only thing we could count on were the slow steady breaths that escaped his lips, and his sloppy heartbeats.

Harry's doctor had called the boys and I into his office for a very important discussion so we all sat in the plush black chairs whilst staring at the ceiling.

It was always very silent whenever we were called in here. Trying to prepare ourselves for whatever the news may be, whether it was good or bad.

After minutes of tension, the doctor finally walked in and sat down on his large chair with a sigh. He gave us a small smile "Hello boys, good to see you all again."

The rest of them shook his hands with a warm greeting while I just sat there and looked him intensly in the eye. "What is it?" I asked getting straight to the point.

"Nothings really changed. He still seems to be breathing correctly, all of his organs are working so thats good. But he still hasn't made a sign of waking up anytime soon."

I frowned and closed my eyes, rubbing my temples. This was nothing new. I sighed "Anything else?"

The doctor cleared his throat nervously and I opened my eyes quickly. "What?" I asked urgently. "Well.." He started, moving uncomfortably in his seat.

I stood up "Tell me already!" I said a bit louder than needed. Zayn put a hand on my shoulder and I tried to calm myself.

The doctor sighed "Look, Mr. Styles has been out for a good three months now. Normally with cases like his, the patient makes at least some signal of waking up. Whether its slight movement, fingers twitching, or even lips moving. Harry has not done anything regarding his wakening."

My breath got stuck in my throat "So what are you saying?" Niall asking him. The doctor looked down at his clip board with a frown.

"I'm sorry boys, but if Harry doesn't make any sign of him waking up in the next month, we can't do anymore for him. We will have to unplug him."

That sentence crumbled me.

'We will have to unplug him'

"N-N-No." I finally cracked.

"Mr. Tomlinson, we can't do anything more if he is going to wake up. I'm terribly sor-" I cut him off

"NO! You can't do that! You can't do that to him, you can't just give up! You have to try!" I yelled, grabbing onto his white coat.

All three of the boys had to pry me off of the poor man and pulled me out of the room, taking me into the waiting room.

I fell on the floor and placed my head in my hands. "No No No No No NO!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.

Liam pulled me into a hug, his own tears running fast. I struggled to get out of his grasp for a while before sighing and letting him hold me.

"They can't do it Liam. They can't let him die!" I yelled again and Liam shushed me softly, rubbing my back. "It will be okay Lou. He's going to be okay." He said to me softly.

I tried to believe his words, but we all knew that the words were just hopeful wishes. Non of us really knew.

I began to thrash in his arms and Liam grasped onto my wrist tightly. I yelped out in pain and Liam pulled back alarmed.

"Are you okay Louis?" He asked me worriedly.

My eyes widened and I looked down at my arm, blood dripping from my hand. I pulled my hand back instantly and covered it up. "I'm okay, it's nothing." I assured him in a rush.

"Louis, what-" He began before I cut him off. "I said I'm fine!" I hissed.

Just then I felt the other boys hold me down and Liam slowly pulled my sleeve up against my protest. I heard him gasp and I closed my eyes, small tears falling down my cheeks. I was caught.

"Louis oh my god." Niall let out, his voice breaking.

Liam pulled me up and I could see visible tears in his eyes. My lip shook violently and I felt them all hug me tightly. "I-I'm s-s-sorry!" I said between sobs.

I continued to say I was sorry and they rocked me back and forth while I cried. Zayn tried to shush me and rubbed my back reassuringly.

"I just want Harry." I whimpered. 

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A/N

Aw that was sad :(

What do you think of this chapter guys? Tell me what you think! I'll update very soon!

~Lizzy xx