Letters to Phil. (Phan)

Letter Twenty One.

August 1, 2015

Dear Phil,

Hi, Phil. I'm really sorry I haven't been writing. Then again, you probably know why. Pj said he kept you and Lexi updated on me, so why wouldn't you?

So, the whole not eating thing has gotten to me finally. On the fourth was when it started, but I kept passing out at random times and throwing up whenever I tried to eat. So they kept me in the hospital for about two weeks so I could get better.

I am so tired, oh my god.

Right now, I just want you to come home and lay with me in my bed and let me sleep cuddled into you, although I know it won't happen. Especially not now.

I miss when we were like that. Whenever one of us was sick, the other would cuddle them close to make them feel better. I miss that, Phil. No one is here to do that with me anymore and it makes me sad.

I posted a video today, though. That's always good. Except, I started crying in it because I got a text while filming. And honestly, I thought I was getting better, which I mean, I am. I'm accepting that you've moved on and everything and that I lost my best friend, but I guess I'm not as much as I thought I was.

So really, Phil. I just wanted to write this to you to say Congratulations.

Congrats on being an engaged man.

Love,
Dan.