X, Y & Z

Chapter 9

“I-I am pregnant.” Xavier took a shaky breath and ran his hand roughly through his hair.

“Um guys, can I talk to her privately for a moment?” Gionni gave me another hug before he walked out with Becca hot on his heels. I started messing with my shirt nervously and I wouldn’t look up at Xavier.

Would he be mad? Sad? Happy? “When did you find out that you’re pregnant?”

“Yesterday.”

“Oh.” It was quiet again for a while before Xavier broke the silence. “Well look, we have to tell Ava, then we can start-“

“No! Do you hear yourself? I’m not telling my sister that I got pregnant by her fiancée! There will be no starting anything! I’m going to have MY child and support them.”

“First off, you will not take OUR child around me! I am just as much entitled to take care of them and love them as you!” I broke down in tears.

“This shouldn’t have happened. It all happened so fast; you were a stranger then all of a sudden you were in my bed. Ava always got everything! She got the better grades, the better job, the better boyfriends and now, she gets the man who’s fathering my child.”

“She won’t want me after she finds out.”

“See? That’s the problem! It’s still going to be her choice! SHE will choose if she wants to forgive you. SHE will choose if she wants to marry you, and what about me? I’m left with the left over attention until my child comes and they will be raised partially by their aunt, so she still wins! Ava always wins!”

By the time I was done, I was screaming, standing up, and breathing hard. “Zoe, you don’t need to feel like that, ever.”

I laughed harshly. “Yeah, like you would know how I need to feel. I always feel like sh*t and I know I’m a horrible si-“

“Shut up!” I was stunned. Xavier had never screamed at me before. “You don’t think I feel bad? Ava calls me every night asking how things are. What am I supposed to tell her? That things are going great because I’m constantly having sex with her sister? It hurts to hear her say that she loves me and I can’t even repeat the words back because I’m so guilty!”

“Then why did we continue? Why didn’t we stop?”

“Because I like you! I shouldn’t have, but I do. When I wake up in the morning, the first thought that comes to mind is your face. When I wake up in your bed, I relish in the feel of your soft body under me. I like you so much and I know how wrong it is. I admit, it did happen fast, but for once, I don’t care. You make me happy and I don’t care if it happened in the span of a month and a half.” I was crying again, but out of sadness. I was finally getting a confession, but definitely not the way I wanted it.

“What about Ava?”

“I don’t know, Zoe. I honestly don’t know. Because I love her, I do.” That hurt to hear and I sobbed. “But I’m falling in love with you.”

***

I had to get out of the house for a while, it was too awkward after Xavier’s confession. He hadn’t waited for me to respond and just left the room and I haven’t seen him since. I decided that I didn’t want to be alone with my thoughts, so I decided to call everyone up. First was Sam.

“Hey bunny, what’s up?”

“Why don’t you come over and chill by the pool?”

“Cool, give me 15 minutes.”

I hung up and called Gionni next.

“Hey Gio, I really don’t want to be left alone today. Want to come over and maybe you can introduce me to your lucky guy?” Gionni laughed.