Trouble ▸▸ Kellic

11.

My body felt limp and useless as his hands traced the outline of my arms, making my skin shiver with delight. His fingers felt delicate against my soft skin, and I soon felt my eyes fluttering close as I let myself relax. There was a first time for everything, wasn't there?

Ghost lips touched my exposed ear as his fingers trailed lower, meeting contact with my clothed waist. His grip was firm and powerful, letting me know that he had no intentions of letting go. Time felt frozen as he moved closer, his body warm enough to keep me from freezing for days. I wanted to turn around in his arms; to reach out and touch his lips with my own.

His hot breath against my neck made goose bumps rise all over me within seconds. All I wanted, needed even, was for his lips to dance along my skin. But that moment did not come, and as I finally built up enough courage to face the man I yearned for most, all I saw was a mass of black. The weight of his arms around my waist disappeared and I was left all alone. Closing my eyes, my mind seemed to spin before I felt a new weight.

My eyes opened to meet nothing but white, and then suddenly, black. I sat in a chair as the cloth of a blindfold kept me from viewing my surroundings. Desperate for contact, I outstretched my arms before me, clutching nothing but air. But then suddenly, I felt my fingers touch something soft; something warm. Reaching further, I let my fingers run through his hair gently, untangling some of it. My other hand traced his jawline before I let my palm rest on his cheek. Slowly and cautiously, I pulled him towards myself. He was obviously not standing, but kneeling. His head became a heavy weight on my legs as I continued to run my fingers through his silky hair. Forcing him to lift his head, I waited for him to stand up. When he was up, I grabbed onto his arm and pulled him forward. His breath hit my own as I closed my eyes behind the blindfold, waiting for his lips to meet mine. The heat from his breath seemed to have slipped out of thin air as the blindfold disappeared and I was no longer in a room of white, but in a room of red. Tears brimmed my eyes, so I closed them and didn't dare open them again.

Had I been foolish enough to believe what wasn't mine could be touched so easily?

--- -

My dream didn't seem to make any sense, yet it did. The black, white and red, and whom I could best assume was Vic. Why in the world would I have ached for somebody like him to crave my attention and affection? He was the last person on the Earth I wanted to be with. Silently, I kept replaying the faint details of the precise dream. It had shown me a side of myself I had never explored before; desperation. Never had I been as desperate as I was in my head, in that dream. I mentally and physically craved for Vic, or whoever, to want me in the same way I wanted them. And when I believed I was going to obtain him, he vanished and my desperation only became a heavier weight on my shoulders.

Sheets ruffled, dragging me from my thoughts. Vic sat up in his bed, letting out a groggy moan of displeasure before pushing aside some of his hair that had fallen over his eyes. I watched him in admiration, stopping myself when I became aware of my actions. Stop yourself, Kellin... Nothing good could come from this.

"Mornin'" Was all Vic said, his voice cracking here and there. I retaliated with a simple good morning, letting him leave the room in silence before I gathered up my own clothes and shut the door, changing hastily. Once I was properly dressed, I hurried out of the dorm and went downstairs to the lobby for breakfast. Like usual, I was planning on claiming a spot at Vic and his friends' table, but a bump on my shoulder interfered with that.

"Hey, watch it- oh," I stopped myself before my voice could carry out any other verbal insults. Justin gave me a look of confusion; I sensed it the second our eyes met. "Hi." I spoke first after Justin didn't retaliate.