"Shae I..." Brian sighed and shook his head as if to clear it. "You already know this..." He muttered to himself.
"Know what?" I asked quietly.
"Q, come on man, we've gotta go!" Sal shouted to Brian from the other side of the security gate.
Brian kissed me hard and said goodbye before running through to security, leaving me bewildered.
I slowly walked over to Oli, who was looking more than a little upset. I shook off my confusion and put my arm around her shoulders. "You ok chicken?" I asked gently. She took a deep breath and nodded. "You decide what you're gonna do?"
"Yeah...nothing. Not yet anyway. Will see what happens over Christmas." We started to walk back to the car. "What was going on with you and Q anyway? Looked pretty intense."
I quickly explained what Brian had said...and what I thought he was going to say. "This is the second time you've heard or almost heard him say it...both times when you're leaving each other. What is he playing at?" Oli pondered.
"I don't know Ol, seriously."
"Don't worry about it too much." Oli advised as she climbed into the car. "You know how he feels about you, even if he's never said it. Well not properly anyway."
"Hmmm..." I agreed distractedly. This was going to play on my mind for weeks, I just knew it.
Luckily I didn't have a chance to think about it too much. Work was manic in the run up to Christmas, with finishing projects and preparing for exams. And home was just as crazy. We were going to be in New York for the whole of the Christmas holidays, so somehow we needed to pack enough to last us but we didn't know what. Brian and Sal said they had things planned for us but they wouldn't tell us anything more.
The night before our flight, I was flying around checking that we both had everything. All my things were by the door with the exception of my travel clothes and toiletries, which I'd pack in the morning. I quickly skyped Brian to remind him of our flight details then I went to sleep. I wasn't looking forward to getting up at 4am.
It was freezing cold and raining when my alarm went off at 4. We had an hour to make sure we had everything together before the taxi came to pick us up. I went and made some coffee before doing anything else. I heard Oli stumble into the bathroom and laughed. Why we decided on such an early flight I don't know. Neither of us were morning people.
Hearing Oli come out of the bathroom, I made my way back upstairs to have a quick shower. Once I was done, I looked along my shelf in the bathroom cabinet for what I would need to take. Toothbrush, toothpaste, face wash, moisturiser, tampons... I froze.
Oh shit.
With the mad rush of the last few weeks, I hadn't paid any attention to dates or anything. Standing in front of the mirror, I tried to work it out. I had been due my period the week after Brian left. With the crazy of him being here it must have completely slipped my mind that I was late. Over two weeks late.
Oh shit.
I heard Oli shouting that the taxi was here. I wasn't even dressed yet. I ran to my bedroom and threw on my clothes. I needed time to think. Which was something I had none of right now. I grabbed my bag, checking I had my passport and the tickets and flew out the door behind Oli.
I stared out of the window of the taxi, my mind reeling. I needed to be sure.
Oh shit.
I needed to get a test.
Oh shit.
I have to tell Brian.
Oh shit.
"Shae? Shae!!" I turned to look at Oli. "What the fuck is wrong with you? Come on."
I hadn't noticed that the taxi had stopped and our entire luggage was on the pavement and Oli was waiting for me to get out of the car. I felt as if I was on auto-pilot as we checked in. I did what needed to be done, but none of it really sunk in.
I needed a moment on my own, I had seen a chemist after we had gone through security. I would have to buy test. Fuck. Oli was asking me what I wanted to drink. "Just a water" I muttered, ignoring the look I got from her. We always had a drink at the airport, regardless of time. "I've got a headache, maybe later." Seizing the opportunity, I told Oli I was going to get some painkillers before rushing over to the chemist.
I had to be quick, Oli would end up coming to look for me otherwise. I randomly picked up a test kit and some painkillers and made my way to the counter.
I might not even be able to take the damn tablets, I thought wryly.
I shoved the test kit into the bottom of my bag and slowly walked back over to the bar. I knew I needed to go and take the test but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I looked over at Oli, who was sat on her phone and grinning. She was obviously texting Sal.
I smiled when I thought of the two of them. They were finally admitting their feelings for each other and I think after this break they would probably make a go if it. The only thing that stood in the way was Casey. This would be the first time she had seen him since the last visit. "It will be fine, I promise." I said as we sat on the plane. Oli had been voicing her worries about seeing him and Sal together. "You're forgetting that Sal sees him all the time. There's not a chance in hell will they not have discussed everything."
"I guess so." Oli sighed and closed her eyes, unwilling to talk about it anymore.
With the conversation over, I turned to look out of the window and tried to figure out what to do.
