Breathe Me...

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"Ouch, I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah, I think that I might break
Lost myself again and I feel unsafe" - Breath Me, Sia.

We arrive at the warehouse in an hour and a half. I get out of the car, adrenaline pumping through my veins, and sprint into the warehouse. The lock has been busted on the door. Definitely forced entry. I take a deep and go to open the door but it won't budge. It's been locked from the inside. James appears beside me.
"Can you try the back door?" I ask him. He nods and runs around the corner. I put my ear against the door to see if I can hear any noise coming from the inside. Silence. I take a step back and kick at the door. It starts giving in and I throw my left shoulder against it. It flings open just as James comes through the back door. My eyes search frantically around the whole place. It's empty. The concrete road blocks that were in rows in the middle of the warehouse have disappeared and the walls are bare. Except for one single painting. My painting. I run to it and gasp, my hand covering my mouth. I feel James behind me. Written across my painting in red spray paint that has dribbled down in places are the words:
IF YOU WANT TO SEE YOUR LOVER BOY AGAIN, COME TO HIS APARTMENT
I kneel down on my knees, taking all of this in. What could they want? Why are they doing this to him? I take in a shaky breath and exhale it slowly.
"Are you going to go?" I hear James ask. I don't reply as I hear my heart beating loud in my ears.
"Amber?" He presses.
"Yes. I have to." I tell him.
"I'm coming with you."
"No. They want me and only me. I don't want you getting hurt."
"Just let me wait in the car at least." I hesitate but nod. He could help me if anything arises. We run to the car and speed off to Oli's apartment block. In the car I agreed to let James come up stairs and wait just outside the door. As we walk up the last step onto his floor, fearfulness hits me full force and I nearly stop, but I push myself to walk on.
"Just go wait around the corner on the stairs and when you hear the door close you can wait outside and listen to any conversation that occurs." I whisper to James. He nods and waits around the corner. With a deep breath, I lift up my shaky hand, balling it into a fist and knock on the door loudly and strongly. There's hushes and then the door cracks open. When the person looks me up and down, he opens it fully and pulls me in roughly, slamming the door shut behind him. I hope James took that as his cue to stand and listen by the door. I look around Oli's small apartment. 4 tall, buff men stand with their arms crossed in front of their muscular pecks and everything is messed up, paintings off the walls, drawers pulled open. But the photos remain up. The man who pulled me in looks me up and down hungrily, an amused smirk on his lips. I cross my arms as well and stand tall, lifting my head higher. The guy in front of me laughs, glancing back at his mates who laugh with him. I gulp.
"I'm surprised you came." He says, his voice husky and low. He has an American accent.
"Where is he?" I ask, my voice coming out stronger then I expected.
"Where's the money?" He retorts.
"What money?" I ask.
"The money that Oli fucking owes us." He says, stepping closer and uncrossing his arms, obviously frustrated. My breathing quickens, but I manage to calm it before speaking. I lock my blue eyes with his extremely dark brown ones.
"I don't know anything about any money." I tell him.
"Don't lie, Doll." He snarls, back handing me suddenly. He hits me with so much force that I fall onto the ground, the left side of my face stinging. I look up at him, chewing the inside of my lip to stop myself from tearing up.
"I'll let you have a little think to see if you can recall anything." He says. "Okay, times up. Where the fuck is the money?" I shake my head and he slaps me. My right cheek stings and I wince. So many memories of being Dylan flood into my head. Oli hitting me that one time is mixed among them. Then I remember something. The money in his sock drawer. I gasp.
"Did you remember something, Doll?" He asks. I gulp and glance at the sock drawer. It's already been raided.
"Yes."
"Tell me." I stand up and walk over to the drawers. The men all look at me. I pull the drawer open more and look around it deeper. The money is gone.
"Last time I saw any money, it was in here. But it's gone." I tell them. All of a sudden from the bathroom I hear the sound of someone punching someone and that person groaning. I glance at the men and they all watch me in an amused way. Like they know what's behind the door. I slide it open and see a blonde haired guy standing over a brown haired guy. Oli. I can't breath all of a sudden.
"Oli!" I yell. The blonde kid who looks so familiar, smirks at me and shoves me out of the bathroom as I run towards Oli and keeps shoving me until I fall onto the bed.
"Remember me?" He asks, crawling over me and grabbing my face roughly in his hand. I look into his electric blue eyes and my eyes widen.
"Callum." I whisper.
"Oh babe, I wanna hear you moan my name." He groans. "Do you think you could do that for me?" I swallow and shake my head, trying to push him off me.
"Get away from me, you creep." He just holds my face tighter and chuckles.
"Don't try to fight me." He chuckles. "You won't win." He whispers in a hiss. He kisses me hard and rough and I don't kiss him back.
"Kiss me and your boy won't get hurt." He says. I take one glance at the boy on the floor bleeding and groaning in pain and don't hesitate to kiss Callum. I feel his lips form a smirk against mine and I try not to gag as his tongue moves around in my mouth. He pulls away and bites my lip.
"That was hot." He chuckles. I try to struggle again, but he's too strong.
"I see you changed your hair." He says. "You are ten times hotter with blonde hair."
"Get off me. I need to see Oli." He just chuckles. "Please, he's going in so much pain. Take me instead. Please. I'll get you your money. How much do you need?"
"30 grand." I close my eyes at the amount needed and nod quickly, opening my eyes as I try not to cry.
"You may see your lover boy." Callum says, getting off me, only to smack my bum as I run over to Oli.
"Oli, oh my god." I say as I skid onto my knees next to him. He barely gets out a 'hi'.
"I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry."
"It's not your fault." He tells me, his voice raspy and hoarse. "I'm sorry I dragged you into this."
"We're going to get you to the hospital, okay?"
"No, I'm fine."
"Oli, no. Please."
"I'm not going. I refuse to let them take you."
"It's better if its me."
"You shouldn't have come."
"Yes, I should have and I di-"
"Blah blah blah, cut the shit. Say your goodbyes and we're getting the fuck out of here, baby." Callum interrupts, winking at me. I clench my jaw and turn back to Oli.
"I'm sorry I left you."
"It's fine. I'm fine." I can smell alcohol on his breath and my eyes widen. He chuckles but stops quickly and clutches his stomach.
"Yes. I'm drunk and yes, I am a drunk."
"Oli, why?" I ask, a tear rolling down my cheek.
"Because I still love you." He says, his face serious. I chew the inside of my lip. I did this to him. I left him and made him feel terrible.
"I..."
"Come here." He whispers, lifting his arm and putting his hand on the back of my neck to push me closer to him. I lean down and kiss his lips. I taste blood in my mouth from him split lip but I don't pull away. I've missed him and this so much. I pull away and rest my forehead on his.
"The things you do to me." He says with a smirk on his lips. It takes me a moment to understand what he means but when it clicks in my head I glance at his crotch and my cheeks flush red. He laughs but stops immediately, groaning.
"It's time to get moving, Doll." I hear the big buff guy say.
"Benny is correct, move the fuck out of here people!" Callum yells. "Sam, gag him and blind him." I'm pulled to my feet by a pair of rough calloused hands and I scream.
"Don't blind him!" I scream. I hear Benny chuckle.
"We're not actually going to blind him, Doll. Just cover his head with a bag and shove cloth in his mouth." He says casually.
"What about me?" I snarl.
"Boss?" Benny asks, turning to Callum.
"I think you know what to do." He smirks, coming right up in my face and grabbing it between his rough calloused hands.
"We are going to have a lot of fun. Just me and you." He winks, pecking my lips.
"What's going to happen to Oli?" I ask, tears filling my eyes.
"Don't you worry about him." He smiles before throwing a punch at my face, knocking me out.

I wake up in a dimly lit room. I feel rope binding my wrists together behind back and I struggle, trying to free them. What is going on? I ask myself. I yawn and feel my jaw erupt in pain. I lick my lips and taste dry blood on them. Shit!
"Hello?" I call out.
"Amber!" I hear Oli yell back.
"Oli! Where are you?"
"I don't know just come towar-" His sentence is interrupted by a pained scream. His pained scream.
"OLI!" I scream, grazing my throat.
"Oh for fucks sake! Shut up!" I hear Callum shout. Oli's screaming hasn't yet stopped so I struggle to my feet and begin to run towards it.
"Oli! I'm coming! I promise I'm going to help you."
"NO!" He screams. My steps falter and I stop. I don't know whether to ignore him or go to him. I want to help him and if I find him I can.
"YOU CAN'T HELP ME!" He screams one last time before his screaming stops.
"Yes I can Oli! Yes I can and I will. I promise." I look around for the sign of movement, but all I can see is the flapping of the plastic sheets strung up everywhere.
"Don't." He says, his voice raspy and hoarse I can barely hear it. My feet start moving on impulse to his whimper as someone punches him.
"But I want to. I won't be able to live with myself otherwise."
"You already helped me Amber. When we first met. You helped me become a better person. So thank you. I love you." I don't want to say it back. It doesn't feel right. Maybe I've finally let him go.
"No, Oli, I'm not going to leave you here." I tell him as I keep walking towards his voice.
"Get out of here!" He yells at me. And now I'm actually scared to find him. He sounds like he's about to kill someone.
"Amber!" He growls. "Get the fuck out of here and don't you dare turn back! Or you will never see me again! I promise you that!" I swallow and feel a huge lump in my throat. "Do you hear me?"
"Yes."
"Then what are you still doing here?!" With that I start running. I don't know where to but I just run. I find stairs and leap up them.
"Where'd she go?" I hear Benny snarl. "Find her!" I hear Oli start screaming again. I have to bite my tongue to keep from yelling out to him.
I see a door up ahead and keep running to it. As I reach it, I jump through my arms so they are in front of me. I try the handle and it opens. This feels too easy. But Oli told me to run, so I'm going to do that. I'm going to run back to his apartment and I'm going to call James. Because I need him.

It must have looked funny to a lot of people as I sprinted past them with my hands tied in front of me. I think a few people even tried to stop me and see if I was okay. But I didn't stop running until I got here. Oli's apartment. The door was left ajar so I push it open and go in. I quickly grab a knife from the kitchen drawer and start cutting through the rope on my wrists. When it's off, I notice the rope burn has bruised my skin. I ignore it and grab the phone, immediately dialing James' mobile number. He picks up at the end of the second ring.
"Hello?" He answers, sounding extremely stressed.
"James?" I ask.
"Amber?" He replies. I start crying from the overwhelming feeling that James is going to keep me safe. "Amber, thank god. Are you okay?"
"Can you come back to his apartment block?" I sob. "I'll me you out the front."
"Yeah, of course. I'll be there in one minute." I nod and hang up. I leave his apartment without taking a second glance at the pictures of us together that he took strung up around the room. I stumble down the stairs and just as I come out of the from door, it starts to rain. I look up at the black night sky and let the rain mix with my tears. I rest my back against the brick wall of the apartment block and close my eyes. A horn honking makes my eyes snap open and I look at the black ute parked in front of me. I see James get out of the car and come around onto the foot path. I look at him as I start to cry again and he holds his arms open. I run into them and he hugs me tightly.
"I'm never letting you go like that again. I'm never letting you go in general." He says, kissing the top of my head. "You scared the shit out of me. I thought you were gone forever." I look up at him and see that his eyes are red and puffy. He's been crying. For me.
"They hurt me." I say.
"Then I'll kill them."

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