Dylan and I were driving home from the Halloween store. We had decided on buying Netflix and chill t-shirts. I would be Netflix and Dylan would be chill. Tomorrow was sports day. I had the honor of wearing Dylan's lacrosse jersey.
"Are you coming over for some Netflix and chill Dyl?" I asked. Dylan's face lit up at the mention chill, "I mean Netflix and cuddle. You're not getting that lucky." Dylan's face frowned, but then he smiled again.
"Yeah, want to stop off at McDonald's first." He smiled.
"I think you know the answer to that."
We went to the drive through and I asked for a package of ten chicken nuggets and fries and Dylan got a Big Mac and fries.
When we got to my house I immediately put on Netflix. We had decided on the movie Bridesmaids. We ate in mostly a comfortable silence.
I wasn't even focused on the movie after I was done my meal. I was to busy looking at Dylan. I was taking in his features and remembering the amazing times we have had with each other. My heart was filled with pride and joy. My body still felt the tingles I did the first time we got together. I realized something very important to me. I loved Dylan. It wasn't puppy love or me over guessing my feelings, it was real. It scared me. But for the most part excited me. Does he love me back? That was the real question.
"You okay babe you seem off. Also you have been staring at me for like five minutes straight? Did you do something to my face that I am unaware off?" Dylan asked me.
He put his head on my shoulder. I panicked. Should I tell him. Yeah. I should it's been almost two months. Instead of telling him fist I kissed him hard. I could tell he wasn't expecting anything as it took him a few moments to respond. The kiss was chaste at first. It was ever so sweet. After a few minutes though it turned more needy. I straddled Dylan. We made out some more before he tugged on my shirt, signaling me to take it off. I stopped not wanting to go any farther before telling Dylan.
"I just realized something." I informed him, still straddling him.
"What."
"I love you." His face paled. Not the reaction that I wanted. He moved me gently onto the couch.
"I-I have to go." Dylan exclaimed.
"Why Dylan, Is it because I would not take off my shirt. Am I just a game to you? I don't care if you do not love me back but at least say something instead of running out of my house. The house that you have spent so many night sleeping with me and watching movies with me. Have we not shared so many memories that I do not even deserve an explanation? Am I that unworthy of you, that you would rather go suck face with Becky Martin. Huh. Tell me Dylan did you even like me at all or was I a bet by your stupid egotistical friends?" I screamed at him, tears dripping down my face.
"I have to go Cindy." Dylan said lowly. I shook my head at him and pointed at the door.
"You really fucked up Dylan. Don't bother talking to me tomorrow."
My heart dropped. He didn't say it back. He didn't even acknowledge it. He ran from me. Stray tears were falling own my face. I checked the window to see if Dylan's car was still there. It was there. Dylan was sitting in it, running his hands through his hair. It was a habit that I noticed he would do when he was stressed or upset. He was banging his hand on the steering wheel. Dylan and I made eye contact for a few seconds. I was sure he could see the look of despair in my eyes, hoping he would come back inside my house.
He pulled out of my drive way. I turned away from the window not wanting him to see me break down even more.. This happened almost to fast for me to process what was happening. I sat down on my couch, hugging a pillow to my chest. Bridesmaids was still playing in the back round. If only he would have just told me that he did not feel the same way as me, instead of leaving, knowing that I was a crying mess right now. Dylan was so stupid to think that I would forgive him over this. Not to mention he had my Halloween costume. I was supposed to wear his jersey to school tomorrow.
I had paused the movie and cleaned up our McDonald wrappers, throwing them in the trash. My mom wouldn't be home for four hours. I headed up to my room, trying to contain my tears until I was in my room. When I got up there, I felt even worse. There was so many reminders of our relationship. I wasn't sure if we had just broken up. A wasted relationship, all because I told him that I loved him. I didn't cheat on him or was a bad girlfriend. I just told him three whole words.
Dylan's red lacrosse jersey was hanging on my door. Yesterday I was so damn exciting to wear it. Proud for people to know that he was my boyfriend. I certainly was not going to wear it, unless Dylan magically made up is mind that he didn't want to be a dick anymore. What should I do with it? Most girls would have destroyed it by now, but I did not feel hate towards Dylan. Were sixteen, almost seventeen, love can be a scary word. He has not had a real relationship with anyone at all. I decided to take the jersey and put it in my backpack, so I could give it to him or Minho tomorrow.
I told Dylan not to talk to me. I hoped that he would though. That he would change his mind and even if he didn't love me tell me that he would need some time to fall as in love as I was. I sound so desperate, I thought. Feeling drained and tired, I fell asleep.
I woke up a few hours later to my phone ringing. Excitedly checking to see if it was Dylan, I sprung awake. Minho's name was on my screen. Feeling disappointed, I answered it anyways.
"Hello" I croaked. I cringed from how terrible I sounded.
"Cindy are you okay? You sound like shit."
"I'm fine. I'm surprised Dylan has not told you."
"That is the problem. No one knows where he is. His mom phoned me and I thought he was probably was with you. You guys did go costume shopping right?"
"He was with me until about five and then we fought and he stormed away." I told Minho, suddenly feeling too embarrassed to tell him why Dylan stormed away.
"What did you guys fight about?" Minho asked. I could hear how concerned he was.
"I-I told him I loved him and he refused to say anything about it." I sighed, "He said he had to go and I yelled at him and then he left."
"oh"Minho was silent for a second,"I am sorry, that is such a dick move. Do you know where he went?"
"Nope he just left." I said my voice cracking at the end. I didn't realize that I started crying until my voice cracked.
"Cindy are you okay? Should I call Lindsey?"
Sobbing, I just said, "Yes." and hung up the phone.
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Next update will be coming soon. If you like my story check out my Dylan O'Brien Imagines!
