Demolition Lovers

And We Go Cold

[Gerard] 

I stand in the doorway to my bedroom, our bedroom, one hand on either side of the door jamb as Beth packs up her belongings left here over the past two weeks. She's crying, and mumbling and tears threaten to fall down my own face as well. I'm trying to stop her and find the words to calm her fears and make her stay, but I'm at a loss.

Finally, she turns to me with a duffel bag in her hands and tries to push past me. 

"N-no." I say defiantly. 

"You're not leaving me. Not today." I tell her, pushing her lightly into the bedroom once more. She looks shocked that I touched her like that, but I can't think of that right now. I need her. She can't leave me, oh God please don't leave me! I'm crying now and she's just staring at me. 

"Don't look at me like that." I spit and she backs up, sensing the same fear she did when I chased her for drugs. Those things are ruining my life, they're taking my girl from me. Not anymore. I can't let her leave. She isn't going to leave me. 

"Gerard, please," she tires to collect herself and look confidant, but her words are shaky, "just until y-you can get it together. Okay?" She's trying to convince herself. You can tell she needs more affirmation to leave, she's knows its easier to fall into my arms and stay. And God I want her to do that. 

Suddenly, she tries jumping around me, but I catch her in my arms and carry her to sit on the bed. She drops her bag and starts thrashing about as I hold her there. 

"I'm worried about Frank, Beth. Listen please, just help me find him." I beg her. I don't know what Frank's doing with the drugs, but I know he had a rough night and his depression is hitting him like a brick. She nods, though defeated. 

"I'll help. But then I want to talk." She says. 

An enormous weight is lifted from my shoulders at the fact that she just wants to talk. Maybe she;s calmed down a bit. I take a chance and kiss her, and she kisses back, and for now that is enough for me.