thirteenth

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**Trigger warning***
Ahh this song though<3

Some people say suicide is the cowardly way out of life, but sometimes life just gets to hard to handle and suicide is the only option. We weren't put on earth to be in so much pain, right?

Life is supposed to be filled with joy and laughter, not pain and crying.

So what happened. How come my life ended up being so fucked up.
Lots of people say "god wont put you to it if he couldn't put you through it" but sometimes i just thinks that's total bull shit.

God has put me through so much and honestly i cant handle it any more. Its become to overwhelming for me and i just want it all to end.

No one will care any way. No one ever did.

My moms gone so she wont miss me. My dad is never home any way, and my friends, well they can live the rest of there life with out me, they can always make new friends.

I slowly raised the gun to my head.

"Shelby i have your....." the lights flicked on and Tristan came into the room.

"What the fuck are you doing?"he asked dropping books and running over to be.

More tears fell down my cheeks.

Just a few more seconds, that's all i needed was a few more seconds.

"What where you doing?" He asked. I don't know if his voice was angry or said or hurt.

"Answer me goddamn it" he said with a softer tone.

"What do you want me to say?" I snapped "yes Tristan i was trying to kill myself and believe me if you didn't come in i would have. There is no point in living when all i feel is pain. No one cares about me so why should i. I don't give a shit about my life any more and i want it to just end." I whispered the last part. He slowly took the gun from my hand and put the safety on it.

"I care" he whispered.
I choked out a sad sarcastic laugh.
"No you don't. You can find new friends you don't need me."

"I do need you Shelby. No one else on this earth is like you. Your a strong person and that's why i like you so much. You are everything other girls aren't. Your pretty you have an amazing personality. You are probably the best thing that's ever happened to me." He was standing up pacing around my room.

"That's not true. There are so many other fish in the sea"

"Yes. There are thousands of fish in the sea but out of every single one of them i want you. I don't want no Nemo looking clown fish or a fucking...what ever fish dory was. I want you" he sat down beside me.

I started crying even more.

What was i thinking. My mom would have killed me if i was to kill myself.
Sometimes things just get to hard.
Ugg.
He wrapped his arms around me in a secure hug.

After a few seconds of silence Tristan spoke up,trying to lighten the mood.

"And please don't ever try to kill yourself again or i will personally reincarnate you and beat you up for leaving me."

A/n
Short chapter
I've been waiting to write this chapter my whole life.
I literally love Tristan.
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<3

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