Chapter Seven:

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My stomach is in knots as we drive to my house in silence. Ethan holds my hand and gently rubs his thumb over it, "Are you sure you are going to be okay" Ethan's voice breaks the silence. I look from the world outside to his face; he wears a worried look like it's a mask. "Yeah I'll be okay babe" I say looking him in the eye. Once in the drive way my body starts to tense up and I try to take a deep breath. "You don't need to do this you know. You can always change your mind" Ethan says. "No I'm not changing my mind this needs to be done, please don't worry I will be okay."  I lean in and give him a peck on his soft lips and get out of the car and walk into my house.


There is dead silence when I enter the house then I see her sitting on the couch. She looks up from whatever she was doing and speaks. "There's the little whore. What do you want" Her eyebrows raise and her dark eyes seem to pierce my soul. "Look I didn't come here to fight; I came to patch things up with you." I shove my hands in my pockets, something I do when I feel nervous. She then gets up and starts to walk toward me, her arms crossed. "There is nothing to patch up because we are not talking." "You won't even hear me out" I yell, "No I won't! You took everything from me! You took the only man I ever loved, you took my only son! It should have been you in that car....at least if it was then my son the child that I loved and cared for the most would be here with me! But no instead I'm stuck here with my slut of a daughter who brought her lover to her own brother's funeral. Why couldn't it have been you in that car!" Tears well up in my eyes and my voice shakes as I speak, "You think I wanted this...You think this is what I asked for because it sure as hell wasn't." "Oh really! You even got the flag that was supposed to go to me!" At that very moment she charges toward me and grabs my hair. She spins me around and throws me; I lay there for a couple seconds then get up and dust myself off. Sadly she wasn't done; my mom comes up to starts to throw punches. I lose my balance and fall to the floor. Slowly I try to rise and get on all fours when I feel a hard blow to my ribs. I fall on to my side and clench my stomach as pain shoots through me. Then my mother does the unexpected, she climbs on top of me pinning me to the floor and wraps he hand around my throat. I try to fight her but it's no use I'm too weak to get her off of me.

My lungs scream for air as I try to gasp for it with no such luck. Black spots start to appear in my vision as it gets harder and harder for me to stay awake.  I reach for something anything to get her off of me. I feel my fingertips brush the glass of our giant vase as I continue to reach for it. With what ever little strength I had left in me I grabbed the vase and hit her on her head causing her to fall off of me. She rubs her head as I try to catch my breath and get to my feet.  Once I get to my feet I stumble to the door and with one last look at my mothers face I run out the door.



Ethan is leaning against his car when I run out of my house but I don't bother to stop at his car, I don't want him to see me not this way not again. He calls my name but I don't stop I just continue to run away. There is one place I can go where I feel safe where I feel comfortable so I sprint that way. It feels good to have oxygen fill my lungs as I sprint down the road but my legs are burning from running so fast for such a long distance.


The sky has an array of pinks reds and oranges by the time I reach my destination. My lungs burn so bad and my legs feel like jelly so I make my way over to the white sand and sit. Thankfully no one is there it's just me and the waves. Suddenly my phone buzzes so I pull it out of my pocket and take a look. Ethan is calling me but I decline the call I just don't want to talk to him or really anyone for that matter except for one person but I can't talk to him anymore, he's gone. When my phone stops ringing I look at the screen and see tons off missed calls and text from both Ethan and Grayson, I just turn my phone off and go back to watching the wave's crash on the sand.


"God I wish you were still here" I say as I look up at the stars. "Why did you have to go? Why did you have to leave me? I don't think I can do this without you Derek."  Hot tears start to stream down my face as I speak. "I just want my brother back" I say as my voice shakes and my lower lip trembles. "I love you...... Can you hear me?" "I can" a framilar voice says it's so sudden that I jump and look behind me. Gryson slowly walks toward me, I turn back around and look at the water. "Eth and I have trying to call and text you...why haven't you answered?" "I didn't want to talk and still don't want to really" I answer while not breaking my focus. He sits down next to me and looks out at the water. "You know you had Ethan and I worried sick" he says as he looks at me. I didn't look at him but instead looked at my feet, "Ash what happened" asks Grey. "Nothing don't worry about it I'm fine." "It's not nothing Ash. Ethan and I have been looking for you all day. We looked for you everywhere." I didn't answer him instead we just sat in silence and looked out at the once blue ocean that was now black.  Neither one of us spoke for several minutes until "I got into a bad fight with my mom" I say finally answering him. He turns and looks at me with calm and gently face. I refuse to look and continue to watch the water, "Things got really bad so I ran and came to the one place where I knew I could be okay...where...where I used to come with my brother."  I feel the tears once again and look down at my feet. "I don't know I guess I just came here to be close to him again." I sniffle and listen to the waves, "I really miss him Grayson" I say as I look at him and look deep into his eyes. The tears start to come faster so I look back down at the ground and let them hit the sand as I quietly sob. Suddenly I feel two strong arms wrap around me and pull me close. I cry into Grayson's chest as he runs his fingers through my hair.  "I know you do Ash, you just let it all out. You just cry...I'm right here" He says in a soothing voice. Suddenly I feel a pair of smooth warm lips on my forehead, I'm supprised but I don't bother to bring it up.


Eventually my tears dry and I go back to looking at the black sea when the wind blows and I shiver. "Are you cold? Here take my jacket" Grey says as he slips off his jacket and drapes it on my shoulders. I flinch when he does this from both fear and pain I hope he didn't notice. "I'm not going to hurt you" He says which means he noticed. "Thanks Grey but I think we should really start heading back Ethan must be panicking." "Yeah I think you're right" He says as he gets up and brushes himself off then he extends his hand. I except the offer and get to my feet then brush the sand off of me. Silently we walk to his car and get in, He turns the heat on when we get inside and we drive off. The clock reads 2:30am when we drive off, eventually my body starts to relax and I start to drift off to sleep.

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