Across The Street

[18] a little healing

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"How much can you change and get away with it, before you turn into someone else, before it's some kind of murder?"
- Richard Siken

[18] a little healing

I didn't know what to say. I was hurt and confused and I was afraid I'd say something I didn't want to, so I kept my mouth shut. Rejection hurt, but I didn't need to make it a big deal because that'd be wrong. She stated how she felt, and I needed to respect that. So I stood up and muttered, "I should probably go." And I needed to. I needed to get as far away from her as possible.

Clarity bit her lip and ran a hand through her messy black hair. "Oh...Okay. Well, I guess I'll just..." She trailed off, looked up at me before looking away. I just turned and started walking to my car, not even bothering to wonder what she would've said.

The next three days weren't the greatest. I pretty much isolated myself from everyone. My parents noticed and tried to pry a couple times before they gave up when they got nothing out of me. I dodged all the calls or texts I got from Mia and Flynn. David and Claire kept to themselves and respected the space I needed.

I knew that isolating myself from everyone seemed to make everything worse, but I just didn't want to talk to anyone or do anything. Of course, I worked at the diner like I always did but that wasn't anything new. But other than that and being at home, that's pretty much all I did. In the mornings, I walked Thunder because I knew he liked going on walks. Then I went to the diner to work for a while before going back home.

It wasn't until Wednesday when my friends came over to my house to inspect what was going on. Thunder was at the end of the bed, asleep. I was reading and listening to Twenty One Pilots. The door opened and I had thought it was my mom at first, but once I looked up I realized I was wrong.

Mia and Flynn were standing there, side by side, looking at me. "Sorry for interrupting your private time," said Mia, welcoming me with her big brown eyes and dark hair. "But we came over to make sure you were still alive."

I closed my book and stretched before sitting up. "What do you mean?" I knew what they meant, I just didn't want to address it.

Mia rolled her eyes at me. "Well, you haven't answered my calls or any of our texts. Flynn and I had to call your mom but she didn't provide is much of anything because, well, you're ignoring her too."

"I'm not ignoring anyone, just...keeping to myself," I muttered.

"We thought your phone broke or something," Flynn said, running a hand through his curly hair, pulling his lower lip into his mouth, worry written all over his face. "Then she told us that you weren't talking to anyone, so we knew something was up."

"And that's why we are here," Mia said, sitting down on my bed and petting Thunder who'd woken up once they entered my room.

I felt a little bad for isolating myself now seeing how worried they were for me. I bit my lip and looked down. I didn't know what to say or what to do, but I knew I didn't really want to talk about it. I busied myself by changing the song from Fall Away to The Run and Go by the same band I was listening to earlier. Mia was watching me, and I made sure not to look at her or Flynn.

"Nolan," she said, a hand landing on my forearm. I looked up then and her face calmed me a bit. "What's been going on?" Flynn sat down on the other side of Thunder who seemed delighted at all the attention he was getting, his tail wagging and nudging Flynn's hand for him to get more attention. Flynn looked down and smiled then began petting my dog who rolled onto his stomach for a belly rub.

I ran a hand through my hair. I hadn't showered in a day or two. I just didn't feel the motivation to do so. I cleared my throat, "Nothing." I bit the inside of my cheek, and forced a smile on my face. I was hoping it would look a little convincing, but by both of their faces they could see through the mask.

"Okay," I breathed out, sitting up a little more. I leaned my head back on the wall and let in a deep breath. "I went and talked to her." I thought back to when I'd first told Mia about Clarity and the advice she'd given me. I wished it would've went the way Mia had thought it would, but it didn't. And I knew I shouldn't be acting so sensitively, but I couldn't help feeling that way.

Mia frowned, "It didn't go so good, did it?" I shook my head. Flynn patted me on the arm in a way of comfort and Mia hugged me. It felt nice, the comfort they'd given me. And I was glad I confided in them now.

"Look," said Flynn. "It's kind of a good thing you two talked about it, right? Better than being stringed along because that sucks, like, super bad. She's missing out on being with you because you're pretty awesome. And don't think you ever aren't just because someone doesn't like you."

Mia was looking at Flynn, nodding. Then she turned to me, agreeing, "Yeah, what he's saying."

Flynn jumped up from the bed, an exciting glint in his eyes and I knew automatically that he was up to something. "Nolan, my dear boy," he drawled, smiling, "I think that it'd be quite exciting for the three of us to go do something."

"Flynn, I-"

"Shh," he said. "I'm not done talking, okay? Now, where was I? Ah, yes. Okay. Since you've not been doing much, as in not going anywhere with anyone or anything - I'm not counting the diner, shush - we must go do something to cheer you up." He grabbed my arm and pulled me up off the bed. I just looked at Flynn. He started to fix my messy hair with his hands, trying to smooth it down. "Mia, choose something for him to wear, please? I'll work on this hair."

I took a step back. "I can get dressed by myself, you know."

Flynn took a step forward. "Yeah, we know."

"But it's so much more fun choosing it for you," said Mia from across the room at my closet, skimming through my shirts. I sighed and looked back at Flynn.

"I'm done with your hair, I guess," he said. "I can't tame that cow lick on the side or the dirtiness. Dude, when was the last time you took a shower?"

I ran another hand through it. My hair didn't feel that bad, well, at least I didn't think so. "Um, in a day or two." I didn't care what I looked like right now, honestly, I'd rather just stay home and sleep. But my friends were worried and I felt bad for making them worry so much, so I deserves to go out with them just for a bit.

"Here. Put this on," Mia said, handing me one of my old band shirts and some jeans. "You'll look cute."

"Where are we even going?" I asked, slipping off my shirt to put the other one on. Flynn was flipping through my books on my desk while Mia had went back over to my bed to pet Thunder.

"There's that one Pizza Place," said Flynn. "What's it called again? It's kinda hippie themed?"

"Mellow Mushroom?" asked Mia, looking over at Flynn who nodded excitedly. That place was really good, I couldn't object to that. So we all went downstairs and told my parents who were sitting on the couch watching a game show that we were going out. They sent me a small smile, and went back to watching the television show.

We got in my car, Flynn whining that he had to sit in the back seat, and Mia promising he'd get the seat on the way back. But he still made a few side comments about it, just to mess with Mia. Flynn began singing the song on the radio happily, scooting his body forward so he could be closer to us as he goofed off. Gradually, Mia began singing quietly. She didn't like singing a lot because she got embarrassed easily when it came to that. And, weirdly enough, I found myself singing along to. And being here with them made everything okay.

Even if it was only for the time being.

Update is here!! About time? Yeah, I know

Teen Wolf is killing me with all these cliff hangers, omg !!! Also, has anyone started watching Shadowhunters?

Comment what you thought of this chapter :)