Chapter 22

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Kate's POV

Alexandra was a great friend, she might have lot of issues in life she was still one of the best person you could have.

She's straight forward and I couldn't deny she's stupid too. We promised to each other that no one will fall in love, although we had this friends with benefits, we valued the friendship we had, I regret of leaving her behind all those years, many things happened in that short period of time, I was gone busy with my business career and forgot the most important person in my life.
She brought colors in my black and white childhood and teenage years, she introduced me in so many troubled things, but one thing I learn from her, that Bad choices Makes Best Stories, Alexandra wasn't a bad choice, her actions was a bad decisions yet it makes fun to her life and I was amazed of her ever since that day I met her.

When I heard that Alex has undergo certain circumstances, I rushed all my business proposals and hurriedly ran back to her.

I didn't want her to feel alone, we maybe had this hundred of friends but admit it, there's only one who understand you deeply, and Alex knew it was me.

At first I was so afraid to see her, I just thought she wouldn't talk to me, that she's so mad at me but things turn out completely opposite. Whenever I watched her beautiful hazel eyes, all I see was a person of passion, not an Alex who was drown to bad habits.

I tried to distance myself away from her, I left without telling her, I didn't even contacted her although everytime I see her name flashing on my mailing list it makes me jumped out of excitement to reply but I did tried harder not to do such thing, what's the point of running away, if I'm still communicating to her, but she needs me, and I need her. Yes! I already fall in love with her and that was the biggest reason I had when I leave her, all those times I was in love to her.

I want to drown in family business to forget her, to keep my company far from her, maybe I did but this strong feelings has grown brighter even we are miles away, it's like the distancing I made make my feelings grow stronger instead of taking it away. When she told me earlier about Miss Anderson, there's no greater happiness written in my heart but to see her fully happy with someone, she's happy with her even Natasha rejected her so many times. I can't deny the truth that it caused pain in my chest, I realized that what if I didn't leave and just tell her about my feelings, what if I stay with her, what if we have a chance. But I can't change what was already passed, I'd rather see her happy, I don't want her to know, I have to keep it hidden, it is better to stay like this with her, she just look at me as her best friend and nothing more. I know one day will come that everything I felt for her will gone.

Earlier, the kiss we shared. It was a total strange, it was odd, she never kiss me just like that. Maybe we made out a lot, have sex together for times, but the kiss we had this time was so far of what lust is. Playing it in my head for a millionth times, and I couldn't bring myself out of it, slowly placing my two delicate finger over my lips, I could still feel it, the way she kissed me before, her lips gently nibbling mine, th way her mouth touches mine was a kind of thing we never done, we never shared, the genuineness, the gentle. Those kisses feels like it has something in it, it has emotions.

Yet, it is impossible for that to happened, I heard it from her, she likes Natasha so much, not just like, I can see through her eyes, she loves her but she's not admitting it yet, she's not accepting it fully that she fell for her. Maybe, maybe it was just nothing but a friendly kissed, and here I am over analyzing what is it all about. Its just a friendly kissed, it was soft because she's just being real about the friendly thing. There's nothing to it.

No meaning, no attachment, no emotions. Just genuine feelings of Alexandra for me, that I'm her friend.

Just a friend.

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