Lee Pace's Characters Preferences

Secrets (Part 2)

Roy Walker (The Fall): "Who's this little girl? Is she your niece?" you asked. Your eyes examined the framed photograph hung on the wall by the staircase. It was a photo of Roy on a wheelchair, a hint of smile playing on his lips. Next to him was a young child, probably around six years old. She was beaming at the camera when the photo was taken, showing off her teeth. She was standing next to Roy. Her hair was braided into two pigtails. 

Roy stopped mid-track. He was making his way down the stairs in search of you when he heard your query. You looked up to find him staring back at you, a frown plastered on his face.

"Are you alright?" you asked, furrowing your brows. You walked up the stairs, eyes still on Roy's dazed outlook. When you stood before him, you took Roy's hand in hopes to snap him out of whatever trance he was in. "Roy?"

"There's something I should tell you," he began softly. His gaze lowered to where your hand was holding his.

"O-Okay," you stuttered, slightly taken aback by his tone. He led you back to his bedroom and sat you down while he paced back and forth before you. "The girl in the photo," he started. "Her name's Alexandria. She was a patient at the hospital where I was after the accident." You nodded calmly, bracing yourself.

"She's a lovely kid, very curious, full of questions about everything and nothing. And even though, English isn't her first language, she likes stories, just like you. So, she used to visit me when I was bedridden, requesting me to tell her stories. So, I obliged, and I made them up as we go." You watched Roy paced before you, his hands gesturing wildly as he relived his story.

"The thing is... at that point in my life, I wasn't sure what was going to happen to me. The doctors weren't sure whether I would ever walk again, and it was my first gig as a stuntman, I didn't expect it to be my last. I was devastated, and to top it off, my girlfriend at that point was quick to leave me for the star of the movie. I wasn't too surprised but it was hard to come to terms with with everything else  happening," he sighed. You noticed the darkness in his eyes. Something that you hadn't seen before. You wanted to tell him it was okay, you wanted to hold him, but decided against it. You could tell this wasn't easy for him and he needed his space and time to relay his past.

"So, I tricked Alexandria." You quirked an eyebrow at that statement. This was probably what Roy was ashamed to admit. "I used the story I was telling her as a way to get her to keep coming back, and once I was sure she was hooked, I asked her to retrieve some painkiller for me. Naturally, she did, unbeknownst to the fact that I was planning to use them to end my own life. I was ready to give up. I couldn't imagine living without my legs, without love, and having to rely on help from others for the rest of my life. I was scared. I was ashamed. I was depressed. But Alexandria misunderstood my instructions and so, her first attempt of retrieving some painkillers was a failure."

You tried to get Roy to look at you but he was adamant on avoiding your gaze. He was afraid to look into your eyes, afraid of what he would see in them. "Then, I managed to get her to steal a bottle of them from a neighboring patient, but they turned out to be placebo. When I woke up from a killer headache, realizing that I was still alive, I lost it and shouted at Alexandria and the doctors." Roy's voice began to tremble. "Later that night, Alexandria believed that she had wronged me, tried to retrieve more painkillers for me and fell down in the process, cracking her skull. I felt terrible when I heard the news. I didn't realized how much of an impact I had on her. And that pushed me off the edge. Not only was I facing the reality that I may never walk again, but I was desperate and terrible enough to trick a little girl to help me off myself. I wasn't thinking and that fall could've killed her. I didn't know what I've become. I couldn't think straight. And that scares me. I'm a horrible person, Y/N. I'm a monster. I'm terrified of what I'll be able to do when times are tough. I'm scared by the idea that I could become that person again," he stopped pacing and finally turned to face you. His eyes were red with tears. You could tell he was afraid. You got up and walked over to him, taking his hands with yours.