Perfruor | Psychopath | Jimin

9. Invisible

When I was 15, my family and me went to Rome with my mother's colleague and her family. They had a daughter who was one year younger than me. During the two weeks we were in Rome she would constantly brag. It could be about anything to be honest. She was quite materialistic on top of that, so her bragging about clothes would never end. Now, it didn't bother me that she was materialistic, but the fact that she would compare the two of us and conclude with the delusional fact that we were a lot alike, expect for the fact that I was older and she was beautiful. Never did she say that she was more beautiful than me, all she said was that she was beautiful, leaving me with a silent feeling of not being attractive.

My point is that one day she went too far. Well, I can't really blame her for what happened, but I still will. What's the point of taking the blame when you can blame others?

Seeing that we traveled together with that family we also booked the same hotel, and our hotel rooms were on the same floor. One night she knocked on the door and asked me to come out for a night swim. Both of our parents were out for dinner, which meant that I didn't have a reason not to go. When I started doubting she started pouting. Though she never said it, I think that she looked up to me, or I would like to think that.

Long story short: I went with her even though I couldn't swim, and to this date I still can't swim. When she started taking off her shorts, that's when I understood I was in some deep shit. I tried to talk her out of it, but this girl wasn't stupid enough to believe me when I said I was tired. She saw through my lies. I had no other options left, than to jump in the water.

Five minutes later I was fighting and battling for air. It was a horrible experience. My lungs felt like exploding. I was hugged by the unforgettable darkness, while the water's temperature made my body ache. I don't believe I got super powers and suddenly learned to swim, but somehow, while an inner agony of pain was spreading, my hand gestures seemed right. It took me, what seemed like, forever to get my head out of the water.

I still remember the grin on her face, when she apologized for not helping me, because she was "in a state of shock", as she described it herself. I am quite sure she tried to kill me that night.

Never did I think that two years later I would find myself in a similar yet hundred times more disturbing situation. The odd feeling of darkness is present again. In the quest of finding the source to the minimal energy I feel in my body, I try to open up my eyes. However, I fail. No matter how hard I try I can't do that.

"I'm so fucking pissed." Me too. Why can't I move?  Then the realization hits me and I get relaxed somehow. There is someone in the room with me.

"I understand your concern." A second voice. I know that voice from somewhere, but I am too tired to recognize it. The only thing I know at this state is that both of the voices belong to two men.

"Understand? Are you stupid or do you simply pretend to be?"

"If you would calm-"

"Don't tell me what the fuck to do!"

Silence. The other voice doesn't speak up. If I weren't in this state I would have said something. What is happening to me? The only thing I wanted was to get some answers to my questions, instead I am lying somewhere with my eyes closed and lost for an explanation on what the heck is happening with me.

"What do you mean by that? Don't you have control over this place?" The owner of this voice is slowly getting more and more irritated. I can sense him being closer to explode now. However, the other voice is still shockingly calm.

"No, actually I don't."

"Maybe it's time for you to step up your game then?"

"Step up my what? If you would, please, listen to what I am saying-" Based on how this person doesn't understand that term, I don't picture him as being very young. Seen as the term not being that old, he should have understood that.