Gifts - Chp 25

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I’ve been sad and depressed before, the loss of the both of my parents and of course my brother is truth enough. I’ve felt lonely and stressed, with such a weight on my shoulder; playing the fatherly and parental figure within the family with no one else to help me pull my family through the tough times. It was such a burden and strain on my shoulders. I’ve felt so many negative emotions in my life, especially this past year, but this month; being kept away from my sweet has been unforgettable torture. I haven’t still been blessed by her family and I’m still being told to keep her away from her, being kept away by her family and the wider society. It’s truly grueling torture to not be able to hold her close – no matter how long it is – or the ability to smell her beautiful, tantalizing scent, or her silky smooth touch alone. I am having extraction from my sweet Lucille and I don’t know how much longer I can last. – Jacob Iris

I opened the door, my head peering left and right as I stuck my face out around the corner. I held my breath, my eyes utterly hesitant and guarded as I thought of the worst possible scenario occurring; getting caught.

Taking a deep steady breath I opened the door before sliding outside, slithering out into the night. The freezing cold air sliced at my exposed skin, that being my face. I drew the heavy coat close to me, the length of it going well past my knees, I wrapped it around my entire body hoping its dark color would hide my white and baby blue gown and thus blend me in during this dark cold night.

It was snowing; it was rare for it to be snowing right here in the centre of France but I wasn’t complaining. It just meant that everyone was locked indoors during this night and majority of all curled up in bed which gave me greater chance of walking by unknown.

Nevertheless it was utterly a beautiful and serene night, the snow glistening on the cobblestone streets and dancing on the distant hills. The snow glistened all over the place, it was truly marvelous and heart stealing and I suddenly longed that I had gone out today for tonight’s social dance.

It didn’t matter though because the very man that I wanted to be swept into the night dancing with close under the sprinkling of the snow wasn’t here. The man that I wanted to finally be able to curl into bed with during the cold winter nights couldn’t do that.

Yet that was all about to change.

I kept to the dark streets, the rather rough and vulgar streets with the scent of horse manure, alcohol and utter filth tickling my nose. The streets were beyond stomaching and I just wanted out but I knew I couldn’t for what I had come to do. I promised myself that after today I wasn’t going to ever going walking in the back alleys, especially at night.

I tried with all my might to not screw my face up in utter mortification at the prostitutes that stood outside in flimsy and the most mortifying gowns possible, or rather undergarments. They stood on the streets corners looking at me with disgust and treating me as if I was the grime on the bottom of their leather boots. At the end of the day I knew jealousy what was the reasoning behind those glances of utter hatred I viewed.

Keeping my head down, especially as I passed the most sinful and wicked bars, the loud reverberates from inside of the cheers, jeers, music and booming laughter that I knew if I could actually see what was happening inside I’d be haunted for the rest of my life. The smell of alcohol and bodily substances from those drunk and filthy man scared me, I kept my head down low as I passed those lit up tiny crannies where numerous bars settled.

My dear friend Petunia often gossiped and spoke in hushed tones of the dark side of the city, the filth and dirt that she looked upon with true repulsion. It was her gossip and those terrifying stories that had me frightened as she told me of what happens down in these part of the cities, and behind in the dark dreary allies.

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