A Ghost In The Wall

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A/N- This chapter is written differently. It won't have any dialogue, and it is all from Rozz's POV

~Rozz's POV

My life has always been Hell. My mom has always been bipolar, and she has never cared about me.

When I first started cutting I wasn't great at hiding them, and when she saw then she made me sleep outside. The second time I had to literally sleep in the dog house.

When I was six my mom pushed me out into the street by our house, and I ended up in the hospital with two broken arms. Of course my mom had told the police that I had tripped.

When I was nine, she forced vodka down my throat because I made an A on an English test. She didn't want me to be smart, she wanted a dumb puppet child that she could control.

Last year I attemped suicide for the first time. My mom was at the store, and I had got a bottle of pills from her room. I downed every single one of them, and had passed out on the couch. I woke up the next day in the hospital. No one visited me, and when I got checked out I was forced to walk home.

This past year my mom got worse. She went from trying to hurt me, to trying to kill me. I woke up many times with her over me trying to suffocate me, or trying to slit my throat with a pocket knife.

I was scared to go to school most of the time, because I was scared a teacher or someone would see the bruises, scars, or cuts that covered my whole body. I didn't want to answer questions, I didn't want to see a counselor, and no matter how much I hated my mom I didn't want to be taken away from her.

It may sound insane, but I really didn't want my mom out of my life. Not completely at least. I hated the abuse, but I couldn't really picture my life without it. My mom was a part of my life, and completely taking her out of it would be like taking a tiny piece of me.

I also hated school. Everything they taught went straight over my head. I barely understood anything, but I always managed to pass to the next grade. I switched to online schooling this year, and it helped a lot, but I still don't understand anything.

I never thought that anyone understood what I was going through until I started listening to the music I do. I never imagined that someone out there was going through the same thing.

When I first got into Pierce the Veil I couldn't really believe it. Someone understood me! Life became a little more bearable with music, it was my best friend. It was something that wouldn't ever hate me, and was always there. It was what kept me alive.

Sometimes I think I shouldn't be alive. Maybe I was supposed to kill myself. Maybe then I wouldn't have been kidnapped, and I wouldn't have hurt anybody if I would have done it before...

A/N

This jumps around... a lot! but its the order that it came to me. Hope it helped you understand Rozz better! I promise I'll update Thursday or Friday! Next chapter will go to Rozz's POV and will tell you what's happening! okay? okay!!

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