What It's Like Loving an Idiot

Three || This Wasn't Supposed To Happen

As James and I read on the couch, many hours pass. James lays on the opposing side of the couch of me. I don't think that he actually realized what he was actually do as he had started rubbing circles on my ankles, until I had to stop him because the area was starting to go numb.

He mumbles an apology and rests his hand on my leg.

I shrug and continue reading. I read for another good chapter before I feel James's eyes on me. Could he not?

"Vena," James interrupts my reading.

I finish my sentence and look at him, "Yes?"

"Are you still angry?" he asks his no hesitation. 

So much for reading... I turn my open book over my thigh.

I sit up a bit. "I don't know, James. I know that everything has been pretty messy, but I need to figure out some stuff before I can seriously give you an answer."

He sighs, "I'm really sorry. All of this is my fault. I just didn't think it would go this far. I thought we'd have coffee a few times a month and that's how Autumn and I would be. I think you're wrong about her using me though, I don't think that she is getting me involved on purpose. It's not like she is going to send me out to do her dirty work."

I shake my head at him, "But she could and I know for a fact that you'd do it."

He smiles slightly, "I suppose so. It's not like I can just say no to her, she's my sister."

I raise an eyebrow at him, "But she isn't really. I mean, yeah, biologically, but you two haven't seen each other for most of your lifetime and just now she wants to be best friends with you. It just doesn't make any sense to me."

His eyebrows furrow, "But she's not making or telling me to do anything."

"Oh really, what about Christmas Eve. That was using you to get some information out of some guy."

"He was going to die if I didn't"

"I know, but the point is that she got you involved and you never asked for it. It seems like you're being forced into this without much of a choice."

He doesn't say anything. Hey, I know what I am talking about and I think James is just too oblivious to see it.

"What I don't understand is why you can't just say no and go on," I say.

He shrugs, "I was talking to this one guy there the other day and said that once you're in, there is no way of getting out."

My eyes widen, "But James, you're not one of them, you are literally her brother. Not one of her stupid workers."

He tips his head back, running his hand through his hair. "I know, it's just hard to understand."

What's not to understand? Autumn's using James for her personal uses and James can't see that. I don't see why this so confusing.

"James, can you honestly tell me that you think that this is going to blow over? That you can get out of this?"

He nods, "Ven, it's not as difficult as you make it out to be. It's not like Autumn is trying to ruin my life over here."

Yeah. Right. I'm sure that bitch will do whatever it takes to screw with my life and his.

"You know she hates me right, with a damn burning passion."

He nods, "I know, I don't know why. I mean you're pretty darn cute," he ends with a smirk.

I chuckle. Sweet talking his way out of any conversation sounds pretty spot on, James.