tRuTh - z.m.

3 - Zayn

March 9th, 2015

"And a caramel frappe, that's it." I said to the speaker at the Starbucks drive-thru.

"Your total is fifteen forty six, please pull around." The woman on the other end said.

I pressed my foot on the gas and Olivia began rifling through her bag.

"No, no, I'm paying." I said sliding my wallet from out of my back pocket. I stopped at the first window and quickly handed the woman a twenty as Olivia started to protest. "I invited you, I'll pay."

"You're so sweet. Honestly, you're everything I imagined and more."

"I hope I live up to your expectations," I said as I took the change from the cashier and drove up to the next window.
"You will, and you'll live up to and exceed everyone else's when you release your solo album." She beamed, tucking a piece of her wavy black hair behind her.

"It makes me feel good to hear that, it gives me hope." The second window opened and the barista handed us our coffees. I pulled off then backed into the farthest parking spot. "I know this is kind of a sketch spot, and I would've taken you inside but it's not fun being famous inside of certain stores."

"Its okay," she said after sipping her drink. "I don't mind. I do have one complaint though, you haven't told me anything yet."

I chuckled. "Okay, let me start from the beginning." I took a long sip of my frappe before continuing. "I walked in and I was late of course."

I went through every detail, even correcting myself a few times. I described Louis' feeling of betrayal and Niall's disappointment. I told her about how Liam was supportive at first but towards the end was kind of upset as well. I told her about Harry was silent for most of it, twiddling his long thumbs around one another.

She seemed disappointed herself, but not in me, in them. She was quiet. She wasn't even looking up anymore. Maybe I'd ruined the perfect picture she'd had of the boys. Maybe she was seeing them as actual people with flaws and feelings just like the rest of the world. They didn't seem so unattainable now. They didn't seem perfect. She didn't aspire to be another version of them like she maybe did before. Whatever the case was, the curtain had been dropped.

"I'm so sorry to hear that, Zayn. I wish they would've supported you like I'd hoped." She looked up over at me. "How do you feel though? You said you felt liberated. Even with them obviously not agreeing?"

I shrugged. "I went in there with one goal and that wasn't to keep any friends. It was to free myself from the band and I did just that. I'm satisfied. I can't say I expected anything more. I'm ruining a good thing. They say don't fix it if it's not broken."

"But you seem to be." She mumbled like she was afraid to say it.

"I am," I said staring out of the windshield. "I was.This is the beginning of a new phase in my life."

"Do you really believe this will fix it all?" She asked me.

"I want it to. If it doesn't I don't know what to do next. I guess I'll just give up. I tried out for X Factor hoping to change everything and it did, but the change wasn't in my favor." I was silent for a while and she let me be. "I guess it's time to change that right?"

"Right." She grinned. "I believe in you, Zayn. Don't listen to Louis. I love him, but he's not right. You're not being selfish. You're being self sufficient, if you will."

I nodded. "You give good advice, you know. I was thinking of your words the entire time I was up there." I slurped on my slushy coffee.

"Really?" She raised her perfect brows up at me. "You were thinking of me?"

"You were thinking about me too. You waited for me to come down."

"Well, that's nothing new. I've already proved to you that I'm more than your average fan."

"I can tell. Trust me, and I do appreciate that. You're way more than average."

"Well finally someone noticed," she said as she winked.

I couldn't help but chuckle. She was a cute girl. Her cheeks were high and full, and her teeth were perfect white squares. I had to look away before I was caught staring.

"Olivia, how old are you?"

"Twenty one," she chirped.

I nodded. "Just making sure no one's gonna come after me for helping you be truant."

She chuckled, smiling brightly, which is something I noticed she did at a lot. She smiled so bright and every time she showed teeth. It seemed like she was just someone who was happy all the time, but I knew from experience, no one is truly happy all the time. Yet she was still so joyous. She seemed like the type of person that people liked to prey on.

Something about her felt like I needed to protect her or something. Not as if she was a kid, just as if she was something valuable. Which she was.

"I skip more than I should really. I really should go to class."

"I'll drop you off, just give me directions." I started the Range up and at that moment, I found myself distracted. There was no worry. There was no doubt. I was just enjoying the moment. Not thinking of this interview here and that performance there.

Olivia guided me to her uni and I drove her right up to the building's door. She kinda stalled a little as she began getting her things together.

"Why don't you wanna go inside, Olivia?" I asked her.

She stopped and just looked over at the building. "It's too many people," she sighed. "I don't really have problems with people, but when there's a lot of them I get so uncomfortable. It's like they're all looking at me or something. I know it sounds crazy but, that's just me." She finally unbuckled her seat belt.

"It doesn't sound crazy." I assured her. "I just can't imagine feeling that. It's kinda my job to have thousands of people stare at me all the time." For a second I put myself in her shoes. I imagined her on a stage with thousands people staring at her.

"I don't think I could ever do what you do. It takes a strong person." She said before reaching over and touching my arm. "You're strong, Zayn. To do what you did today takes courage. Meanwhile, I can barely even walk into class without getting all fidgety and nervous."

"You say that, but believe it or not, you gave me courage this morning. If I wouldn't have had that little pep talk with you in the lift, I don't know if I would've gone through with it. You're so brave, you just don't know it yet."

"Thank you, Zayn. That means a lot coming from you." She was smiling of course, but I could see she'd be swimming all day because of my words. I was glad I could make her day because she definitely made mine.

She opened the door and stepped out slinging her bag over her shoulder.

"I guess this is where we go our separate ways." She was smiling but she still had a somber sounding something in there. "Bye, Zayn it was really nice getting to know you."

That was different. Usually people were just glad they got to look at me or take a picture. That's all they wanted really. The experience of getting to say they saw a celebrity. Not even the experience of seeing the person his self.

"The pleasure was all mine. I enjoyed the time we spent. You really dropped some knowledge on me today."

She giggled and it made me smile.

"I'll see you around, Zayn." She said.

"See you around, Olivia."