The Future Alpha... And Ellisa

Chapter 19- Ellisa

"C'mon, hit me like a man!" I scream at my instructor. Turns out that all of us had to learn to be soldiers before we could study our main sub profession. Luis lunges at me again but I dodge his attack and grab his arm, throwing him over my shoulder and placing my foot over his throat. I grin at him as he fights to catch his breath. I help him up and pat his sweaty back before walking over to get a drink of water. "Why are they making you train? You're the strongest female wolf here!" He says.

I nod and sit next to him on the floor. "I agree. But you know the whole me and Autumn getting kidnapped really ruined my reputation of being invincible." I joke. He chuckles and takes my bottle out of my hands and sips some water. "Are we done yet? Cuz I'd like to go see my mate before I pass out from exhaustion." I ask. He nods and gives me my bottle back.

After I pack my stuff and begin to walk out, Luis stops me with his voice. "If you want, I could speak to Alpha and Luna about you beating my ass, maybe they'll cut your training short." He says with a sideways smile. "Hmmm, nah. I enjoy kicking your ass." I say with a smirk and walk out of the gym. "Tomorrow at 12!" He screams after me. "Got it!" I scream back. I turn the corner to head to the showers, since I really can't wait till I get to Eric's place to shower. I feel gross, sweaty and just exhausted. As I shower, I hear the door open and close. "Hello?" I say as I rinse the soap off and snag my towel to put it in quickly. I walk back into the locker room to look around.

"Is somebody here?" I say. I turn around to see Autumn trying to sneak up on me. "Dammit!" She says and laughs. I release the breath I didn't realize I was holding and begin to dressed. I don't mind getting dressed in front of Autumn since she's my best friend. "Bestie if I had your boobs maybe Ezekiel would finally be happy." She says as she gets dressed as well. I laugh and shake my head. "How was your session?" I ask. "Booooring! She always beats me! But I know she's going easy on me, I still don't have any bruises." She says.

I laugh again. I miss hanging out with my best friend. "My instructor can't beat me to save his life, sometimes I ask myself how he became an instructor or if maybe he's holding back." I say as I finish getting dressed. "They probably are." Autumn says after we both finish up. We walk side side by side back to the pack house. "I miss my parents." She whispers half way there. I stop and pull her arm so she stops in front of me. "What happened? Where is this coming from?" I ask softly.

She sniffs and looks away for a second then looks back at me. "I had a dream or a memory last night and it was when my mom and I surprised my dad with a trip to Disneyland. You know how he always wanted to go there." She says with tears in her eyes and a smile. "I know." I whisper and run my hand down her arm. "I just... I need them here. I miss them so much." She says and her shoulders shake before she finally lets a sob out. I hug her tightly to me and she rests her head on my shoulder. After a little while, I hear footsteps. Coming fast towards us.

I look up to see my brother rushing towards us and he looks at Autumn sadly. He looks to me, silently asking to her hold her. I nod and he gently pulls her from my grasp and embraces her. "It's okay baby." He whispers into her ear. "Ugh gross." I say out of instinct. Autumn's shoulders shake again but not from sobs, from her giggling. She turns in Ezekiel's arms as he wipes her tears to look at me. "You seriously need to get laid." She says and we all laugh.

"Let's go home guys." Ezekiel says as he wraps his arms around both of us. "You couldn't have driven." I mumble. "No, I was feeling sad out of nowhere and I realized it wasn't my emotions. Autumn's right, you really do need to get laid." He says. As we walk, I start to walk side to side from exhaustion. "You want me to carry you." Ezekiel says, and for a minute it's like we're small again walking home from the park and Ezekiel gives me a piggyback ride because I was so tired. I nod and he picks me up piggyback style as he picks Autumn up bridal style.

I laugh in his ear as Autumn giggles in his arms. "My big brother is strong!" I say when we reach the pack house. I jump off his back as he lets Autumn down and leans against the door catching his breath. "Jeez, after that I don't need anymore training." He says and turns to open the door. He leads us to Autumn's room and I collapse on the couch then groan. "I can't get up." I say then slide to the floor and crawl back to the door. "Need help?" I look up to see my mate grinning at me. I reach for him, silently asking him to carry me. He picks me up effortlessly and I say goodbye to my brother and Autumn. Eric carries me to his room then locks the door and places me on the couch.

"Mm you smell good, you took a shower over there?" He asks then walks to the kitchen. I nod then get up to sit at the breakfast bar. "I really missed you." I say and lean my head on my hand. He chuckles and leans over to peck my lips and goes back to what he was doing. "I missed you too. Turns out pack politics are boring as fuck." He says and I laugh.

We fall into a comfortable silence as Eric cooks dinner, spaghetti and meatballs since that's the only thing he can cook without google. My mind goes back to Ezekiel, Autumn and I coming back from the gym. You really need to get laid. They both said it to me and I realize they were sending me a message somehow, maybe they didn't know that but I got it. Eric is going to get tired of waiting for me to be ready. Goddess, he's going to sleep with somebody else. My wolf growls at the thought and I begin to pick at my nails, something I do when I get nervous.

"Babe what's wrong?" Eric asks after he checks the noodles again. I shake my head and pull my phone out of my pocket. 7:17. It's still so early. "Baby." Eric says and sits down next to me. "What?" I ask then place my phone down to look at him. "You're nervous, what's wrong?" He asks and reaches for my hand to lace our fingers together. I feel better when he touches me, so why is it that I can't let him... do me?

"I love you, you know that right?" I say as my voice cracks. He gives me a confused look and pulls me to stand between his legs, his hands resting on my thighs right below my butt. "I just... I'm sick and tired of being a fucking victim." I say and his eyes widen a bit. I usually don't speak to him with curse words unless we're joking or I'm ranting. "What are you talking about?" He asks softly. I look up to stop the tears from coming then look at him.

"You know why my parents are making us all train right? It's because my dumb ass got kidnapped, tortured and sexually abused. Then now I have the strength of a fucking gorilla or something and I can beat my instructors ass black and blue but I couldn't do shit while that stupid fucker did those things to us. And now I can't even mate with you because every time we do something sexual, all the things he did to me flash in my mind. I can't do anything about it and I'm tired of living like this. I know I told you, Ezekiel and Autumn that I was out of the funk, but the truth is that I don't think I'll ever be able to forget those days. I'll never be able to move on and be happy!" I scream as tears run down my face. There. I've finally said it. I didn't want it to be to Eric, but he just happened to be here when the bomb finally exploded.

"Baby-" he says but I cut him off. "No. Please don't say anything about it, I just really needed to vent." I say. He clears his throat. "Of course. I want you to be able to vent to me anytime you want, anytime you need to. I always be there for you my love." He says. I look into his eyes and sobs take over my body. Eric is the most understanding man on this planet. He pulls me into his arms. "I just want to be happy." I say between sobs.

I need to be happy.

Literally almost cried when I was writing this, idk why.