Child of Ice (Thomas Shelby)

Chapter Five: If only I could tell you

Ayla looked out of the window at the acres of green beneath her a peaceful sight. Birds flew in the sky so freely, no worries, no pain just freedom. She hadn't felt this vulnerable in ages.She played with her mothers pearls which dangled around her neck hoping Tommy would be back soon

"you showed me up back there at the races" he put on a slow song.

"Why don't you teach me how to dance properly?" he pulled her in close to him swaying softly to the rhythm of the music

"I don't really know how to dance if I'm honest" she kept her gaze elsewhere not daring to make eye contact "The music is too slow maybe put on something faster like back at the races" She tried to reason with him. A man like Billy Kimber wasn't the kind of man who took rejection easily.

"Then we'd be far away.I want to dance like this.Come on." his breath tingled on her neck. The memories from her past welling into her mind. She knew she couldn't do anything to him other wise it would be Tommy he would come after, she didn't want to compromise anything.

"You weren't so stiff back there, were you? You ever been in a house this big? Hm? Look at you.You look like a bloody film star." his breath angered with alcohol, he let go of her looking into her bright green eyes which dulled at the situation, her heart beating faster than ever. A silent moment between them left a lump in her throat. forcing himself on her she froze in confusion.His lips trailed down her neck, she tried to scream but her voice was swallowed with her pride. She squirmed at his touch till she couldn't take anymore, she snapped pushing him away roughly.

"I want a cigarette" she reached or her bag. he analysed every part of her body wanting it more and more. His thirst became uncontrollable

"I bet you've never had a man like me inside of you" his words cut her in the throat. She couldn't talk let alone scream when he pulled her hair back.

"If I want you I'm going to have you" He forcefully pushes her over the table. Unable to fight as the visions of her father doing exactly the same thing flashed before her eyes. She could feel him pulling up her dress. The sound of the door opening rather abruptly. He peeled himself away from her.

"What are you doing here? I've got another hour." Kimber shouted

"Just wait - listen to me.Just listen to me.I was going to let you go through with it, but in the end, my conscience got the better of me.She looks good on the outside-" Tommy voice was a relief yet agonising sound. She didn't let him finish before storming out. She didn't even want to get in the car with him. She charged up the pebbled driveway fuming with anger her mothers dress trailed along the dirty road. A few feet up the road the sound of a car pulling up beside her made her press her eyes shut for a moment.

"Ayla Get in the car!" Tommy called after her driving as slowly as possible. At this point Ayla felt like she had a knife stabbing her in the heart. She didn't want to be anywhere near him.

"Ayla I came back for you!" he shouted after. She stopped "like I promised".

"You came back for me? and that makes it alright. how could you?" her heart was breaking but she wouldn't cry. There weren't any tears left in her body. The car stopped completely as hand pulled her back spinning her around like a carousel.Those blue eyes she once didn't want to look away from had become her worst enemy

"I'm sorry! alright I'm sorry" he was deeply disappointed with himself for upsetting her so much but this was so much more than one guy forcing himself on her. She didn't cry not even a tear which surprised him.This was the second time he had saved her but she didn't feel grateful this time. He pulled her in for a hug, keeping her close. he could feel her heart beating against his chest.

"You promised" her words awfully fragile. He hated himself for it

"I know I didn't mean for it to happen. I'm here now okay? just get in the car" he pleaded. Her eyes had lost contrast.

The drive back to her house was cold and silent. Tommy hated seeing her like this especially when he knew it was his fault.He wanted to comfort her and protect her from everything. He knew she wasn't capable even if she said she was. There was something odd about her and he was going to find out.

"why did you change your mind?" she finally asked as they pulled up outside her house.He didn't reply. She slammed the car door shut. Unlocking her front door and slamming that shut too.Letting out a frustrated scream as she ripped off the dress and pearls letting them fall to the ground bead by bead watching them roll along the wooden floor but she didn't care. Taking the knives out of her stockings she aimed directly for the mirror which she hit without a doubt.nit wanting to look at her own reflection.

Her life nearly returning to the way it was before she didn't want to stay here in Birmingham anymore but something was holding her back. Her father was still searching for her and here was the last place he would look.

A few hours later Ayla made her way down to the garrison in need of a drink, sitting in her usual seat engulfed in her thoughts. Her silence was soon enough interrupted.

"Ayla!" Arthur called with John and a middle aged woman standing by his side. She stared at her for a brief second scanning every part of her body.

"Is this the girl?" she asked The boys and they nodded. "Give me a moment" she said to them leaving the two women alone. She sat down at the other end of the table, lighting a cigarette and taking a deep drag.

"I'm Polly Gray, I'm their aunt" she finally smiled

"I'm Ayla" her voice seemed unsure about polly.

"So I hear you're good at fighting?" she raised an eyebrow but her face was deadly serious.

"You could say that" Ayla tried to lighten up the mood a little.

"Where did you learn to fight?" She asked, Ayla blinked a few times before looking down at her hands.

"I was taught back at home" she tried to keep it simple not giving too much away.

"Tommy tells me you were taught by teachers and soldiers which means you came from a wealthy home, yet you've managed to find your here..."Ayla could see Polly knew something about her. The way she questioned her was obvious but she really wasn't in the mood to argue.

"So are you going to tell me who you really are?" She sat back in her chair. Taking another puff of her cigarette. Ayla wasn't prepared to tell anyone about her past especially this woman. For some reason she didn't trust her. She looked like she could kill her within a blink.

"Are you a spy? Trying to make tommy fall for you so you can bring him in?" She said taking Ayla aback

"I'm sorry? Is this some sort of joke?" Ayla scoffed at her comment. "I'm just a normal girl, I may have come from a rich background but I'm no spy" a smile spread across her face.

"So why do you keep avoiding the question?" Polly said observantly

"If I told you who I really was you wouldn't even believe it. If only I could tell you, if only it was something I could be proud of talking about but it's not. Just because the peaky blinders own most of Birmingham doesn't mean they own me too" she stood up pushing the chair back across the floor and starting for the door. Polly was surprised with the amount of confidence in this mysterious girl but something inside her felt sympathy towards her. She could tell she wasn't lying with the amount of honesty behind her words but not knowing someone in this business was dangerous and Polly would do anything to keep her nephews out of harms way.