Let Me In

34. Salvation

Chapter thirty four. Salvation

A month had passed exactly, thirty days had passed so fast and I just couldn't keep track of the days and dates. As usual my mind was preoccupied and I just couldn't think about anything other than Jace and the court case. It had come way too fast, I wasn't prepared at all and I was just constantly worrying of what was going to happen. Being in court was just so unpredictable; you never knew what could happen at all. Your life could take a flip backwards or forwards but yet you could never know since the loopholes were thread to close together to let any discarding information out. That was what had me worried, would I be able to see what the verdict was before the judge could tell me themself.

There was much more to add to my list of worries, there were only two days until I would see what my fate and what Jace's fate was. You would be crazy to say that I wasn't panicking of course I was, I was just holding onto whatever sanity I had to stay calm and stay in the peaceful zone until Sunday.

Today was Friday and much to my dislike I had school today, nothing went well at all. I couldn't focus in any lessons and I just avoided Becca, Blake and Drew all day. I thought that it would be better for me to get some alone time without any distractions but the only distractions for me was just thinking about Jace. Was he safe? Was he warm? Was he being looked after properly? Was he eating, did he miss me? Did the people know that he liked to have a bedtime story read to him before he actually went to sleep? Did they even know that he liked to squirt ketchup all over his chips and dunk his fish fingers in the red sauce? Did they even know that he just needed attention and hugs all the time; I didn't think that they did know any of this stuff because the people looking after him weren't his mother or father. Did anyone besides my friends and boyfriend have any sympathy for me, or did they all just think that I deserved what had happened? And my paranoid mind did get the best of me when it came to serious matters, I would always over think matters just to see if I had a better understanding of them and I never did.

School hadn't distracted me from my thoughts like it had usually done; in physics I couldn't even use the correct formula to calculate a simple equation. If it was even possible to forget the simple equation, I actually did forget. I struggled with the whole lesson and Becca who I usually sat with, she wasn't sitting next to me since I had avoided everyone and sat by myself at the back. I had noticed her turning around and glancing at me casually but I made no effort to look back and smile at her.

My best friend and I were on good terms the day after I had told her what had happened she came round my place with two tubs of ice cream and a heck load of movies. She had also ordered pizza and we spent the whole evening eating and watching the movies we had brought. When we were younger that was what we used to do when I was living at my parents' house, whenever we had argued or had a disagreement, Becca was always the first one to make up first and it just showed how strong our friendship was. I would do anything for Rebecca Jade Allen, my best friend. She was the most important girl in my life and having her angry just annoyed me to the point of crying my eyes out. She meant so much to me and it pained me in my chest to know whenever she was upset I sometimes couldn't help her. And she couldn't help me with my situation, she did ease my mind a lot but she didn't take away the pang in my chest which Jace had left when he was taken away.

Blake and I were as strong as ever. Our relationship was another thing that was very important to me and I was determined not to screw it up again. He had tried his best to take everything off my mind and make me as calm as possible but no matter how much he tried I would always just break away from him and shout at him for trying to take Jace off my mind. I understood completely what Blake was trying to do but he seriously wasn't helping and that was one of the reasons why I had decided to avoid everyone. we had been together for nearly six months and it was the best six months ever, even without Jace it didn't seem right that I was sometimes enjoying myself and he was trapped away from me and possibly missing me. I missed my son like crazy but nothing could change the fact that he was no longer at home any more.