Missed Connections

Chapter 53 - Morning Wood

I wake up feeling refreshed. Stretching delightfully and relishing the feeling of the blood recirculating through my limbs, I take a deep breath. The light and feathery duvet provides just enough coverage to stave off the chills, but isn't oppressive enough to cause overheating. The crisp white sheets are perfectly soft on my bare legs.  The pillow behind my head boasts a perfect balance between softness and firmness. I couldn't ask for a better place to wake up.

The cherry on top? The man lying next to me. I glance over to take in Louis' form. A beautiful specimen resting prone with one hand under the pillow. Bedclothes are partially twisted around his legs exposing his calves and tucking nicely around his backside, showing of his glorious glutes. His muss of hair is set in a halo on his pillow, and his long lashes kiss his cheeks. As always, the sight takes my breath away.

But it's more than that. The way I feel when I'm with Louis is unparalleled. The way he looked at me last night left me shook. There was a seriousness in his gaze that conveyed a depth of emotion I didn't expect. What could it mean? We haven't even talked about officially being a couple. Should we?  Will he want to?  Maybe.  Am I imagining our connection? No. The chemistry is undeniable. But sexual tension can be deceiving. Is this just a fling? Something to occupy his time because he is on hiatus and not working on music right now? It could be. What do I if it is?

Dammit.

I don't want to seem pushy or anxious, but it would be pretty sweet to ask Louis what his intentions are. Ok, maybe not those words. I can't sound like I belong in a Jane Austen novel. Maybe I'll ask him if he wants to date? Be my guy? Let me lay me head on his shoulder? Get pinned? Be more than fuck buddies? It's been so long since I have even thought about all of this kinda stuff, I don't even know what to say...

No chill.

But my mind can't ignore what my heart keeps repeating over and over: you like him, you really like him.

Fuck.

Wiping my damp palms on the cover, I slip out of bed and pull on a cozy sweatshirt. I fumble around for the joggies that I discarded part way through the night because I was too hot. Louis brings more than just sexual heat to my bed. His body is like a furnace when he's in a deep sleep. No wonder sleeps in just his boxers. And despite the AC, the loft is a bit warmer than downstairs. Warm air rises and all that. Science! I make mental jazz hands as I find my pants. I'm about to pull them on when I think, nope, too hot. I grab my pajama shorts from my bag instead. Better.

I cross back over to the bed, and place a gentle kiss on Louis' head. He stirs slightly, and I hold my breath. A peaceful smile spreads across his face, but he doesn't open his eyes. His breathing keeps its rhythmic pace and I know he is still asleep. Taking a chance, I run my hand over his hair. It's super soft without product in it. He looks like a sweet sleeping baby. I resist the urge to curl up next to him. Instead, I place another lingering kiss on his lips. They are so soft under mine.

"Sleep well, my sunshine," I whisper.

I slip out of the room, taking a swing past the bathroom for the necessary ablutions, then tiptoe  to the stairs. I pause at the balcony and take in the amazing view. The lake is perfectly still; the surface acting like a mirror and reflecting the trees and nature. Wow. Taking the steps slowly so as to not make a noise, I pad downstairs. First stop is the kitchen, setting the coffee maker to brew some much needed coffee. Next, I cross the room and slip out the patio doors.

The morning air feels cool on my legs. I inhale the scent of it, and the refreshing oxygen opens up my lungs to the very bases. It's as if I can breath in the stillness. My heart swells and my head clears. I careful track down the back staircase and walk towards the dock. From my closer vantage point, I can see a light mist hovering the water of the lake. I walk over to the very edge of the decking. It bobs lightly with my steps, causing minute ripples to track towards the shore. I sit down cross-legged, close my eyes and tune out my mind. I let the peace of nature overtake me. God, I never know how much I need moments like this until they happen.