If You Love Me Let Me Go (Scömìche)

18

When I woke up in the morning, I knew exactly what had happened. Our talk from last night had left me awake until about four or five in the morning, made my mind spin and didn't let me relax. But now, at ten fifteen I was surprisingly well-rested. I looked over to my side - Scott was lying on his stomach, hugging a pillow. I smiled, brushing some strands from his face. He was so cute. And it touched me how he'd trusted me with everything last night. My heart still weighed heavy though when I thought back to the moment he'd told me about his plans. He was going away, letting me free. I should be happy about the latter, and I really was, but it would've been better if Scott stayed in my life.

He made a terrible mistake. He knew it and he was risking his life, no, sacrificing it for me, a boy he met one and a half months ago. Crazy how time can pass so quickly but at the same time feel like years.

Before Scott found me, I was... a normal boy. With a normal, boring life. I had a best friend, a crush, attended parties, was about to graduate... Now, my whole life changed. And... I still debated whether it was a good or a bad thing.

Before Scott, all I had known was absent parents and spending nights away from home. Now, I knew what it felt like to see your life flash before your eyes because you think you're not gonna live the next hour. I knew what it felt like being touched against your will, being betrayed, being beaten... But all of that were things that Alex had done. All Scott did was tie me up... sometimes. Not always. He let me sleep freely and sometimes he even didn't cuff me throughout the day. He took care of me, always came when I called. He never denied me any help. Well... Except for helping me with a certain problem, but we won't talk about that because my mind is going too far.

Scott stirred and a few moments later his eyelids fluttered open and he looked at me, blinking. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes, letting go of his pillow and cuddling me instead, making me chuckle and blush. He kissed the top of my head.

"Morning, Mitchy," he mumbled, his voice deep from having just woken up.

"Good morning, Scotty." I decided to use a nickname too if he was going to use one.

"Hmm..." He hummed. "You smell nice."

I chuckled again. "You too." He leaned back to look at me, then kissed my lips softly. My heart sped up, making me smile into the kiss. He noticed.

"What?" He questioned. I looked away, blushing.

"I like it when you kiss me," I admitted. That made him kiss me again, making me melt into a puddle.

"How fortunate. Because I like kissing you." And another kiss. He smiled like a little kid on Christmas.

"Scotty..."

His face turned serious. I mentally slapped myself for making it sound like the infamous I need to talk to you.

"What's wrong?"

I smiled, trying to make him relax again. He was obviously nervous.

"Nothing, baby. I just wanted to tell you something, well, add something to what I already told you yesterday."

He seemed to relax and tense at the same time. I decided to just tell him, because I considered it a good thing.

"So, um... When you told me you were in love with me..." He looked away, avoiding eye contact. I quickly continued. "What I meant to say was, I told you that it was overwhelming and that I knew that I liked you..."

"Yes?" He sounded so insecure, I wanted to give him a big hug and never let go but I focused on what I wanted to say.

"I've had time to think... I mean, I didn't sleep until early in the morning, so... Everything kind of had time to settle and I know now what I- what I need to say. I'm sorry, I'll get to the point." I was starting to get nervous, too. But I wanted to say it. I wanted to tell him. "Scotty, I'm in love with you, too. You make me feel butterflies, make my heart race and when I'm not with you I'm thinking of you and at night I dream of you and whenever I see you there's nothing that I want more than to kiss you."