#19 Cupid

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(Naoki POV)

Kotoko took a day off. I was glad she listened. I was so scared when she fainted yesterday. But I still had work so I had to go anyway. I returned sooner than I usually do changing my shifts with Funatsu. She was helping oka-san in preparing dinner. At the dinner oka-san asked us all about our weekend plans. Oka-san must have noticed Kotoko being distant. She wasn't hard to read after all. I knew instantly that oka-san was scheming something. I for once was glad and decided to play along.

"I don't have any work." I lied ignoring all my pending tasks regarding the upcoming presentation. Oka-san grinned at me giving me a knowing look. I remained nonchalant but rolled my eyes inside my head.

"Konomi will be coming over to prepare for her upcoming exams." Yuki replied chewing his food.

"Konomi-chan will be joining us so you can skip the exam part Yuki." Oka-san told him.

Yuki scowled at her. "It was not an excuse." He mumbled.

"Oka-san what are you planning?" Kotoko asked her with concern. I looked up at her.

"Family vacation of course! We should go for a 1 night 2 days trip." Oka-san grinned broadly clapping her hands.

For the first time in my life I saw Kotoko being unenthusiastic about oka-san's plans. She was always the first one to get over excited about them. In fact, she looked slightly alarmed. I was so shocked to see the total opposite reaction that, I stopped eating and stared at her.

"Umm oka-san, I'm sorry but I have evening duties." Kotoko muttered looking down.

"Can't you exchange your shifts Kotoko-chan? It's been so long since we went out together." Oka-san's face fell. I was still staring at Kotoko. Out of the corner of my eyes I saw Yuki also gawking at her. She looked up and her eyes met mine. But she quickly looked away.

"I'm sorry oka-san. I can't help it."

"Oh, well..." Oka-san didn't know what to say probably. I'm sure she was flabbergasted. I suddenly lost my appetite to eat. I dropped my chopsticks and told everyone that I was done and left the table. I felt everyone's gaze on my back as I left the room. Right before I go out of the room, my eyes fell on oka-san for a moment and that was enough to see her lips slightly curved into a smile which clearly meant she wasn't done with her scheming yet.

I went to our room. I don't know why I was so annoyed. This has nothing to do with what just happened at the dinner table- I kept telling myself. I'm just annoyed because... because... damn... because Kotoko just spoiled the first vacation I was actually looking forward to. I banged my hand on the table. I felt so frustrated.

Why can't she change her shifts for one damn week? I paced around the room. What has happened to her that her work is always more important than me! I suddenly stopped. What was I thinking? Isn't this what I did all the time? Isn't this what I still do? I always chose my work over spending time with her. I was never enthusiastic about going on a vacation or celebrating any occasion with her.

Well to be precise, this is how I'm as I don't like gatherings. I wasn't enthusiastic about any of these even before I met her. I only participated in everything she was excited about only because- she was excited. But I never showed any interest. I never planned anything or helped her in planning. It was always her. I mostly didn't plan anything because she had fun doing it and I didn't want to spoil it for her. Besides it was fun to watch her make weird plans. But at least I could have shown some interest.

I remembered about a summer vacation plan she made right after she transferred to nursing. She had suggested a few places but told me to choose anything I wanted as anywhere was fine with her. Although I told her it depended on my research, she had deciphered it well as I agreed. But when the plan got cancelled due to her studies, she kept apologizing. To make her stop I told her that she planned it on her own and that I never said I will go so it was fine. I still remember how her face fell at that. I didn't look up on her face but I knew for some reason she felt bad. And now I know the exact reason. Because right now- I feel the same. I missed a heartbeat.

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