To Be With You | Carl Grimes [DISCONTINUED]

Chapter 29: By Just Being Here With Me

The church was quiet.

The silence sounded foreign to me. There was nothing but silence ever since the drive back to the church and it was starting to get under my skin. Nowadays all I heard was snarling and leaves rustling under my feet as I ran.

I couldn't take it anymore. Taking just my knife, I stood up from the pew I was sitting in and left through the doors of the church. Walking down the steps, I turned to my right to go into the woods when I saw Maggie leaning against one of our cars we brought back from the hospital. She had her head in her hands but I didn't hear any crying. I decided to give her some space and walked away.

It seemed like my legs had taken over my mind because I had no idea where I was going. I just kept on walking. The familiar sound of snarling to the right of me for some reason calmed me down. I didn't feel trapped anymore.

I took my knife out from behind my jeans and waited for the walker to come to me. When it finally did, I kicked it square in the chest, knocking it onto the ground. After killing it, I sat down against a tree, taking a breath. I looked down at the walker I just killed, seeing its long dried out black hair, most of it gone from its head.

"I'm sorry you had to go through this." I said to her. "I'm sorry no one was there to save you from suffering. This shouldn't happen to people. "

I've never been more grateful Carl shot my mother than now. If she had to become this, I wouldn't be able to live with myself knowing I could have prevented it.

A thud distracted me from my thoughts. I sprang up, listening as the sound of footsteps came closer. Once they were too close for comfort, I turned and my eyes widened as I realized it was just Michonne.

"Sorry," she said, looking back. I followed her eyes, seeing a walker on the ground a few feet away.

"Sorry, too," I replied, untightening the hand that held my knife back in it's holster and sitting back on the ground.

She sat down next to me, looking up at the only sky she could see through the many trees blocking her view.

"I-I just had to get away for a bit." I said to her. "It was too quiet in there."

I saw her nod from the corner of my eye. "I get it. Silence can be a good thing sometimes, but other times we just want to get away from it. That's okay."

I wiped the blood from my knife as she spoke again, "Rick and I, along with some of the others, we're going..." she trailed off, finding the right words to use, "...we'll be back soon. Just wanted you to hear it from me before you saw us gone."

"Will you come back with good news?"

"I hope." was all she said. She put her hand on my shoulder, squeezed it, and then got up and walked away.

***

I stayed outside for a bit longer, maybe an hour and a half or so, before heading back. Maggie was gone from where I last saw her, so I assumed she was inside. I knew Rick wouldn't take her along after yesterday.

When I opened the doors, everyone inside stood up swiftly and held up their weapons. I put my hands up and once they realized it was just me, they all went back to what they were doing. There were some murmurs from Rosita and Abraham along with coos from Judith. Carl motioned me to come over.

I spotted Maggie with the baby in her hands, just looking at her. I smiled softly and followed Carl into the rectory, closing the door behind me. He sat down against the wall, his knees up to his chest and his arms wrapped around them. I bent down on my knees in front of him, putting a hand on his knee.