Burning Hearts (Dark Chaos MC #1)

Chapter 14

This chapter dedicates to 

aksgr_lovebirds

sweetstick89

wild_wanderer2

blake_alexander

QueenMe_01

Melody's P.O.V.

I quickly started to get ready thinking about pros and cons of having breakfast with the entire Motor Cycle Club. But I can't think of nothing cause I'm just numb. All my mind filled with is fear. Fear of facing so many people. Fear of eating with them. Fear of them finding the secret I'm hiding in the abyss of my heart. Fear of them learning about my darkness.

Fear.....is just an emotion. A sole emotion that can control our entire life. Fear has the power to destroy us. Not all at once. But slowly and steadily, little by little it takes some piece of us. And during that whole time, we're clueless about it till it ruin us completely without leaving anything for ourselves. Slowly, it develops into masters and we'll become it's slaves. It thrust us into darkness not giving even a tiny ray of light to hold on.

In the midst of life and death, so many emotions got control over us. Happiness, sad, angry..... But out of all, fear is the most powerful and hardest battle we have to fight. 

For some, it's an easy fight. They easily defeat it without difficulty. But to others, like me, it's the hardest thing ever to do. The fight against the fear will suck all the strength, patience and courage leaving us feebly till we give up and submit ourselves to it. With fear, comes pain.

The bold truth is, if we fear something, it means, that something will cause pain. No matter if the pain is physical or mental, it's only exhausting. There's no fear without pain. And no pain without fear. 

Fear and pain are inseparable. Both had the capacity to wreck us. They tear down us, shatter us into pieces. It wrecked me completely. Always fearing and always suffering. I'm in it's hands now. Everytime I feel immense fear, a piece of me fades away. Everytime I feel the pain, a piece of my soul fades away.    

It's insane to think that spending just 10 minutes of time with them will do that for me. But that's how I am. Always scared that spending some time with others will let out my hidden ache. I can't change myself even though how hard I tried. 

At first it takes so much time to get used to Daisy too. Everytime she came to me, I'd be sweating so much thinking she'd see through me. With time, I got used to her and her being her helps me too. She doesn't pressure me for anything I don't want to. By any chance, if any topic raise between us about my past, my childhood or my parents, I quickly change the subject and she lets me. That's the thing I love most in her. If I don't want to share any matter with her, she leaves it and don't bug me for it. That's the reason our friendship grows this much.

Our friendship is not like others where they share everything without any secrets. We have our fair share of secrets and don't press eachother to tell it. We respect our limits. If she's comfortable enough with me to share, I'll be there for her. And the same goes for me too. She'll be there for me if I need to.

Having her with me in this time puts my mind at ease a little.

If I say anything stupid making them angry, she'd deal with them for me.