The Son of a Preacher

Chapter eighteen: Losing all over again

Lucas,1986,Huntsville,Alabama

It's the start of my senior year, everyone just wants to graduate. I'm not sure how I feel about graduating, I don't really have the money for college. Plus, who's going to take care of my mother, certainly not my brother. Caleb keeps mentioning how excited he is to get away from him father.  I just worried that he'll leave me behind. Right now, we're just friends that only talk every once in a while. I'm hoping that we can better ourselves and one day be together again. It's going to be hard road but it will be worth it to have a healthy relationship. I'm glad we're fixing things.

Speaking of fixing things, I haven't seen Greg all summer but I'm hoping I'll run into him today. I want to find a way to patch things up with him. I know he hates Caleb but he needs to realize that he can't choose my friends. Just like I never tried to make him and Caleb stop being friends with Micheal. So I don't see how he thinks that he could do that. If I don't see him today, I'm going to go to his house.

I head into school, waving at Caleb as I enter the doors.  Jessica who is right beside him, glares at him as he waves back. I roll my eyes at her, she's so stupid. Why is she with him, if she suspects he might not be into girls. Does she think, she can change who he's into? I'm sorry to tell her this but you can't change who you want. Trust me, I've tried countless times. I make my way to my first class, getting excited when the teacher calls name during role call. Then feeling disappointment set in as I realize he's not here. Maybe he's just running late? 

Through my next four classes, Greg's name is called twice. There's still no sign of him anywhere, but I do spot Caleb in one of my classes. Why would he skip the first day of school? Was it because of me? No, he wouldn't skip just to avoid me. We were good friends but he doesn't care that much about me. I mean, his feelings for me are just a crush,right? Yeah there's no way that he's love with me. I was just the only guy he knows besides Caleb that is into guys. 

I make my way to lunch, trying to figure out what was going on. I sat down in my usual loner spot. I sit there, by myself for a few minutes. Then I feel, someone plop down next to me. I see a mop of brown hair next to me and I instantly know it's not Greg. 

" Hey, you okay?" Caleb asks waving his hand in my face.

" No, I'm worried about Greg." I answer honestly. 

" Why are you worried about him?"  He asks annoyance slipping into his voice.

" He isn't at school today." I answer.

" Why do you care if he's here?" He asks.

" I wanted to fix things with him." I whisper scared he'll get mad. He surprises me, when all he does is shake his head.

" You should be careful, that boy has it bad for you." He whispers the last part.  Does he have it bad enough, that he loves me though?

" I know, I just want to be on good terms with him." I whisper.  

" Also, why aren't you with your friends and girlfriend?" I ask with pursued lips.

" She doesn't have this lunch and Micheal was the only person I hung out with, he graduated." He mutters Micheal's name bitterly.

" I forgot he graduated, at least we're free of him." I say happily.

" Not quite, he's still going to visit to see Jennifer." He says frowning.

" Is that why you had to hang out with him?" I question as his frown grows more intense. 

" Yeah, Jessica and Jennifer are best friends, so I was stuck with him." He says, for some reason not looking in my eyes.  

" I can't even imagine, having to spend all that time with him." I shiver in disgust. 

" He doesn't even treat sweet Jennifer right." He says shaking his head. 

" Yeah that's what I thought, after the way he treated that girl from the bar." I whisper the word bar, not really wanting to talk about that night. 

" Yeah, I don't why any girls date him." He mutters.

" Well I guess some girls, just like that hot asshole vibe." I grin,when I see the glare he shoots me at the word hot.

Before he can say anything, the bell rings. I hop up and run off to my class. He tries to catch up with me but I just run to my classroom. I turn around to see him huffing out of breath and I stick my tongue out at him. He just rolls his eyes, and goes to his class. I get through the rest of the day, pretty quickly. I decided that after school, I will just go to Greg's house and confront him there. He may be fast but I'm still faster. So if he tries to run, I'll just catch up to him. I make my way out of the school building to my car. Well it's really my mamma's care but since she's not really there anymore, I decided to take it.  I honestly just might sell it though. If we get desperate enough for the money, I'll do what I have to do. I'll do whatever it takes to protect my family even if they wouldn't do the same for me. 

I drive to Greg's house and I'm surprised to see both his parent's cars in the driveway. Neither of them are ever home. I met Greg's mom once, she was interesting lady to say the least. Wore very tight clothing, giggled a lot, cheated on her husband, you know just the usual. She actually did love Greg, in her own strange way. Greg's father was always on business trips, so I never had laid eyes on him once. I assuming he looked more like his father since his mom was his polar opposite in looks. 

I park my car and make my way up the driveway. Nervous as I knock on the door, wondering if one of his parents might answer. I'm surprised when a disheveled Greg answers the door. His hair is a wreck, bags under his eyes. I'm even more surprised when I hear yelling in the background. Greg's eyes widen when he sees it's me. He takes my hand, and leads me out of his house. Closing the door quietly behind him, he leads me to his back yard. 

" What the fuck are you doing here?!" He asks snappily. 

" Is everything okay?" I ask avoiding his question.

" My parents are yelling at each other, so yeah everything is just fucking dandy." He mutters sarcastically.  

Greg must really be going through a ton of crap, if he was using sarcasm. Greg wasn't a very pessimistic guy, he was always trying to be nice and upbeat. Now,I'm starting to see through his facade. It was a front he put up because he didn't want people to know the truth. That he was really hurting on the inside and had been for a long time now. At least now, I know that he's not in love with me. His parents are just having problems, which isn't a very nice thing to think of when he's in pain. I just didn't want to hurt him more than I already have. 

" Look, I just came by to try to patch things up." I fidget my hands, nervously. 

" From what I hear, your friends with Caleb again, is that true?" He questions looking exhausted. 

" Yes but come on, I can be friends with him and you!' I plead.

" Sorry but I can't watch you be...." He trails his eyes wide.

" I can't watch you get hurt again." He says re-collecting himself. 

I say nothing to this, knowing he's just as stubborn as I am. Once,he's made his mind up about something, it's hard to get him to change it. I just stare at him hopelessly, wishing I could make things work with our friendship. 

" Listen I gotta go, I have a whore mother and an absent father to get back too." He gestures back to his house. 

Then he walks away, not looking back once. I watch him helplessly,knowing I just lost someone else dear to me. It's like, I couldn't keep anyone in my life. I was fighting a never ending battle that I would never win.