Neighbours

Opening Old Wounds

I no longer have a son. . . The words repeat over and over in my head I sit outside the hospital and drag on a cigarette. My father doesn't care about me. . . All because of the life I chose for myself I let out a long sigh and make my way home.

I push my key in and open my door sliding my jacket and shoes off I close the door and slump onto my sofa thinking. . . Thinking. . . About the old days when I was little my father would take me out for ice cream and bike rides. When Hee was born how he took care of her so that mother could get some rest and he would play with the both of us. Once he started working late coming home really late arguing with mother and spending less time with us it all became about work all we ever spoke about was work "Ji what are your plans for the future? What? Music? You can't even play instruments Kim men don't play instruments. Your future is in business son, stick with me and will be building homes and restaurants all over the world I have so many clients look this is where the money is . . . The music business is full if nothing but drugs addicts and depressed souls" I shake my head remembering as tears fall from my eyes. He never believed in me he always felt that since I carry his name I will get whatever I wanted I go to the bathroom to wash my face I hear a knock at the door.

I run up to the door and open it " hey" Denise says I let out a little smile as she walks in and sits on the sofa "are you okay?" I nod " I couldn't find you at the hospital so . . . . Umm your sister said that she will call you later" I nod my head again she sits there not knowing what to say "you . . . Want some tea?" I ask her as she nods her head. I go to the kitchen to make the tea and prepare everything I come back with two cups she takes one and sips. "Sorry, I didn't tell you that I was leaving the hospital" she shakes her head " nah no need, I know that you're going through something with your dad so it's okay" she puts her cup down I lay my head on her lap and let out a long sigh " what did he say?" I close my eyes as the words repeat in my head again " he said he doesn't want anything to do with me anymore. . . He'll probably take me out if his will" she strokes my hair "ah I'm sure he's not that mad, he's your father after all and you are his only son he wouldn't do that" I shake my head "you don't know my father".

I turn and face her as she continues to strike my head "I remember this one time when I was about . . . Sixteen my father called and told me the name of the hotel he was staying in" I frown "you didn't live with your dad?" She shakes her head " no, my parents divorced when I was six years old, so I hadn't seen him in a long time. I got dressed and told my mum and made my way there I took two buses. And I kept reading the address 442 Mabel drive come off outside the hotel

I got there and the receptionist told me that he had already checked out. I was confused I read the address over and over then asked if there was another branch close by she said no that this is the only one in town she even showed me his name in the computer and I began to cry. . . I was so angry. The lady even sat me down and gave me some tea and reassured me and asked if there was a way to contact him but he didn't give me a number . . . . That was the last time I heard from him and I made sure of that" a tear falls from her eye I can see that she is still hurt I wipe the tear away with my sleeve and sat up " so you never heard from him again?" She shook her head " oh no I did, but I refused to listen he called again and again but I didn't want to speak to him whatever he is doing now I don't know . . . Nor do I care"

Silence filled the room as we cuddled on the sofa I switched the TV on just to hear something. I look over to Denise as she has fallen asleep I cover her with a blanket and lay my head on hers and again begin to think.