Ruthless

Chapter 28

Loved

Tulala ako habang iniisip ang nangyari kanina lang. What did I just witness? Cara was looking at me a bit alarmed dahil hindi na ako kumain. Nawalan ako ng ganang kumain.

The incident bothered me until the next morning. It won't really sink in to me how I didn't notice Sean has very foreign features when Gio nor Maica has foreign blood or even just half. Nagmana pala siya sa totoo niyang daddy na may lahi. I feel so stupid, to be honest.

Isinandal ko ang ulo ko kay Jane. "Bothered ka pa rin?" tanong niya.

"Medyo. Hindi ko kasi naisip na posibleng mangyari 'yon." I confessed.

Hindi siya kumibo at itinuro sa akin ang kung sino ang nakatayo sa harap ng kanyang itim na BMW.

I walked to him fast and he welcomed me in his arms. He gave a sweet kiss on my forehead and looked at me intently.

"You're not okay." he declared. Despite the short amount of time we spent together, he knows me well that he can simply look at me and say I am not fine.

"Are you upset? Did I do something wrong?" he asked, full of curiosity in his eyes.

"That's not it." tipid kong sagot. I don't know how to tell him.

"Eh ano? Tell me please," he said worriedly.

Isinandal ko ang ulo ko sa kanyang dibdib. "I don't know how to tell you this but Gio," I breathed heavily. "he's not the father of Maica's child."

He blinked and his forehead creased. He pulled me into his car.

"Spill," he commanded. Kumabog ang dibdib ko. I am very nervous. I am not sure how to start with this. I sighed heavily.

"Kanina kasi we went out for dinner tapos pagbalik namin naabutan namin sila Gio at Maica sa ospital," I started.

"Dinala pala nila si Sean dito. Based on the symptoms they mentioned, I think it's dengue."

Alzeth seemed attentitive. "Tapos nangailangan ng dugo para kay Sean. No one matched his blood type. Not even Gio and so Maica revealed the truth. That Gio is not really Sean's father."

Alzeth looked away. "That's bothering you. Now that the truth came out and Gio didn't really get the girl pregnant, did your feelings change?" medyo namungay ang mga mata niya.

He burried his face on my neck and sniffed me as he usually does. "Please don't tell me you are leaving..."

Then I felt his hot tears on my clothes. He's crying, oh goodness. I felt alarmed, I didn't know what to do.

"Don't leave me. Please," he burried his face even more and hugged me very very tight as if I'll go somewhere else.

"It's so selfish to hear but I would fucking lose myself if you leave me," he whispered. "and I would never find it again. Never." he added.

I am not going to leave you, Alexus Zethium. I would lose myself, too, if we seperate. If we part ways, I do not know if I can survive the pain.

I almost lost myself when Gio hurt me. I cried for nights and during my first weeks when I was in New York, I tried to show everyone I was fine kahit na sa totoo lang, gabi-gabi ay tinitignan ko ang mga litrato at usapan naming dalawa and I'll cry all of a sudden. I'll wake up with a heavy heart and dark under eyes at pagkatapos papasok ako sa Belleveu at ipapakita sa lahat na ayos ako at walang kahit anong sakit na iniinda.

Kung maghihiwalay kami ni Alzeth, mas malala pa siguro. I think I would totally lose myself. Baka hindi lang ako gabi umiyak, I'll probably cry all throughout the day and night and will never recover. Baka rin hindi ko na kayaning magpanggap na ayos ako.