I Hate You, Mr. Boss-Man [18+]

016

Was I stupid?

Was I an idiot for not discussing my concerns? Was it unfair to compare matters with how it ended with Jacob? Jesse wasn't my ex, nor was I sixteen and naive. I knew what I was doing. I was twenty-five now, and I was grown enough to work through my bad decisions—even if they felt right.

"You still there, Kat?"

"Yeah, yeah..." I mumble, grabbing the handle of the shopping cart to anchor myself back from my train of thought. "So, which one was it again?"

I hear a loud sigh from Jennifer on the other end. "How hard is it to find oat milk?" She whispers under her breath but, I hear it. I would've made some sarcastic comment but, I couldn't find it in me to care. "It had giant barley or wheat? I don't know but it ain't hard to miss."

I reach for the carton on the shelf, placing it inside the cart before continuing to roll it down the aisle. "Anything else while I'm here?"

There was a long pause before she answered me. "Are you okay?" Jen asks, her tone filled with nothing but concern. "You're not as snappy today and, that worries me."

"I'm fine, jus' got a lot on my mind. What else did we run out of?" I grumble, leaning on the cart as I wait for her to give me the next thing I probably couldn't find. It wasn't my fault the damn store had seven fucking brands of oat milk. She hums at me, placing me back into conversations I had with my mother. "Don't 'hmm' me," I scolded, pushing off the handle. "Is there anything else we need?" I ask again, trying to keep calm. I didn't want to have some stupid fight with her because I couldn't get my priorities straight. It wasn't Jennifer's fault that I had trust issues.

"No, you're being mean."

I close my eyes, sighing as I tighten my grip on the phone. "You're right, I'm sorry," I apologize, rubbing my temples to relieve some of the tension. "There's so much going on in my head and, I don't have the means to sort it out right now."

"I could never be mad at you, Kitty Kat." She marvels, and I could hear a smile in her tone. "What's going on with you, did something happen?"

Jennifer knew all about my ex and what happened between us. There wasn't anything I wouldn't tell her, she was my best friend, and she was the one person I trusted more than myself. So, why did I feel like I couldn't tell her about Jesse? "I just...I might've done a stupid thing and fuck if it didn't feel so damn good," I groan, earning a few stares from the people in the aisle with me. I bring the mic closer to my ear.

Another long pause as if the gears in her mind were finally spinning and just like that, she gasps, loud. "Holy shit!" Jennifer shrieks, making me pull the phone away from my ear. I hoped to god no one heard her. "Katherine Dahlia Stratford, you had sex, didn't you?"

How the hell did she get that from something stupid. Maybe because it sounded like that. "What?" I drag, my eyes finding a box of Teddy Grahams and I grab it, turning it over to read the label. "Where did you pull that out of?" I toss the box into the cart.

"It's all in the way you said it. So, who was it? A stranger? A co-worker, perhaps?"

"Woah, Woah," I chuckle, shaking my head at her assumptions. "Slow down, there. I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to. I know you, Kat, and I know when you're acting differently. Look," She muttered as I continued down the aisles. "I'm not going to judge you. I think it's great that you're finally getting back out there. It's been what...? Six, seven years since you've been with anyone?"

"Thanks for that enlightenment, Jennifer," I say flatly, ignoring her obvious call out. It had been almost seven years now and, maybe I've spent a majority of those sulking about Jacob. He was my first love and, it took me a long time to realize that if we didn't work out—it was probably for the best. Jesse didn't exactly make it clear what he wanted and what he wanted from me. Last night was the best night of my life and of course, I wanted it to happen again but, where would it go?