my my my! | t.chalamet ; book 1

28

imessage
_________

lia: ur so pretty
lia: has anyone ever told u that?
lia: ur hair is so pretty
lia: u have pretty eyes
lia: omg
lia: i hate u

timotay: wow ok
timotay: hello to you too

lia: i can't believe U

timotay: excuse me

lia: sorry
lia: omg u hATE ME

timotay: i DONT HATE YOU
timotay: i have NO IDEA WHATS GOING ON

lia: gabby n lilian n andy all took me out for drinks
lia: i got a fake id
lia: i feel naughty

timotay: is that so

lia: mhm ;)
lia: lil rebel

timotay: do you need to be collected, natalia

lia: by u???
lia: i'd love that
lia: omg why didnt u come

timotay: invite got lost in the post maybe???

lia: omg
lia: timmy
lia: come out

timotay: go home lia ur drunk

lia: andys tryna get me to dance

timotay: andy eh?

lia: yes andy white
lia: i posted a pic of him the other dAy

timotay: i know

lia: u didnt like it

timotay: did i not?

lia: no u didnt. u always like my pics

lia: timmy
lia: timmy
lia: timmy

lia: timmy :(

timotay: would you like me to collect you, natalia?

lia: i'm alone outside a bar wit hiccups

timotay: text me the address and i'll be with you

______

when timothée got to the bar natalia had texted him the address to, he instantly saw her sat down on a bench out of it, leaning her head against the brick wall behind her.

"you came." she hiccuped softly, he hummed in response and sat down next to her.

"where are your friends?" he had asked her, she had explained to him through an overly in-depth explanation full of hiccups that they were still in the bar as she said she'd make her way home because she didn't feel very comfortable.

"let me walk you home." timothée offered, she nodded her head lazily and took up his offer. him helping her up and balancing her throughout the journey home.

"andy fancies me." she had stated randomly throughout the walk.

timmy raised an eyebrow and she carried on, "the way he looks at me, the way he talks to me. i know he fancies me— everyone always said that but i didn't see it because we had always been friends, but now i finally feel the same way towards a guy, i can detect andy's feelings on the matter."

timmy was taken aback by natalia's words, he was silent.

"did you know i used to fancy Lilian? but i only did until we became closer friends, now she's like my sister. but i've never felt like that towards andy before. i love andy— as a brother, but not a boyfriend. theres one boy i could see myself being with, but i don't know if the feelings mutual— feelings are never mutual when it comes to loving me," she was rambling, "people like the idea of me, but then they get bored. i'm just seen as a pretty face, which sometimes i don't even see myself as. i feel unloveable, no one i've ever come across has felt a sort of attraction for me— and i feel like maybe andy only likes the idea of being with me but wouldn't be able to cope with the whole of me."

timmy listened to natalia's rambling, every single word of it. "i feel like maybe i'm unloveable, too." he had admitted, natalia looked at him funnily, as if she couldn't believe somebody like timothée could be unloveable.

"i only ever come into contact with platonic love. people like the idea of me— but not the whole of me. just the funny, goofball side but not the insecurities, the emotions, the feelings. you know?" natalia nodded at timothée's words, she felt her heart sink a little as he spoke though. timothée was an easy boy to read, —emotionally, —but nobody is completely readable. everyone has insecurities, sure, and timothée had a lot of them— some of which if he told people about, they'd just laugh and think he was being stupid.

"i don't mention anything to people because it just get shrugged off as me being modest or something, but— yeah its whatever." he quickly disregards his words.

natalia shakes her head, "you shouldn't feel ashamed by how you feel, timmy. your emotions are the most important thing in this world. how you feel is so important,—physically, mentally. everything about you matters, and if somebody can't deal with that, they aren't the one."

as cheesy as sober natalia would have found what she said, she was speaking the absolute truth. timothée smiled at the girl, he bit his lip and then looked down at the ground.

he couldn't believe how —with every word she spoke— much his heart swooned. he felt his heart doing somersaults through his chest and he wasn't sure if he could get rid of the feeling.